


exile

by catefish



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Werewolf, Canon-Typical Violence, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, Injury Recovery, Just two guys chilling in the woods nothing weird here, M/M, Post-Canon, Reconciliation, Silver Snow Route, horror themes, werewolf!dimitri
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-10-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:32:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 22,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26232730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catefish/pseuds/catefish
Summary: They say a beast prowls Tailtean plains.It is said that its body was twice the size of a bear, tall and imposing, its massive physique betraying its overwhelming strength. Its claws were sharper than steel, capable of piercing through a man's body with a single swipe. Under the light of the moon, it would hide in the dark of the night, stalking its prey with calculating patience, biding its time before it would pounce.'Tall tales.' Felix thinks.Even so, it should not serve a problem against his blade, tempered to perfection.--Felix finds Dimitri, alone, battered and troubled.He stays.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Felix Hugo Fraldarius
Comments: 43
Kudos: 76





	1. Full Moon

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter Warnings: Detailed Physical Violence from what can be expected from werewolves and mercenaries. Not too gory but fairly straightforward. The werewolf eats raw animal meat but it's not in detail just in passing. Just putting it out there if it squicks you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Warnings: Detailed Physical Violence from what can be expected from werewolves and mercenaries. Not too gory but fairly straightforward. The werewolf eats raw animal meat but it's not in detail just in passing. Just putting it out there if it squicks you.

The moon was nowhere to be found.

Thunder roared and lightning flashed in the sky. The clouds were dark and heavy with stormfall, flooding the plains with intense downpour as the night drew on. The winds were harsh, threatening to topple the trees in its wake.

Only few would dare venture under this ruthless storm.

It was unfortunate that those few would include him, a lightly armed knight, escorting a weary artist and his friend set on arriving as early as they can to avoid drawing the ire of the noble they sought to serve. From the corner of his eye, Ashe studied his companions, both of which have remained eerily silent ever since the storm had fallen.

Ignatz Victor was not made for travel during a gruelling storm. That much Ashe could tell. Though he had long since gotten used to the loud crashes of thunder and lightning during the war, such were still not his cup of tea. It was in the way he shuffled closer to the middle of the carriage, farther away from the thunder and lightning treatening to strike them at any moment.

By his side was trustworthy Raphael Kirsten, slightly nodding off in his sleep, the complete opposite of his frightful friend. Unlike Ashe and Ignatz, Raphael was the only one who was not easily scared off his boots. He remained calm and jovial as ever even when the first strike of thunder roared in the plains. Raphael was ever the optimist, and Ashe could not help but feel thankful for his company.

However, despite having terrific comrades with him on this journey, the storm had placed all of them ill at ease, sensitive to the way the lightning struck near the carriage every now and then. Ashe could do no more than shake his head in dismay.

He had hoped to arrive in Fhirdiad before the storm fell.

It was just their luck that the storm had fallen halfway on their journey.

The carriage rattled as it trudged through uneven ground, the wheels screeching as they rolled over stray rocks and deep holes filled with mud. Each violent shake sent tremors down Ashe’s spine, his nerves set alight by the probable dangers of travelling under such a violent storm.

Ashe watched as Ignatz muttered prayers to the Goddess, wishing for protection and quick travel, hoping that that storm would end as quickly as it started. But Ashe knew that this storm would likely last the rest of the day and into late at night. Ashe could only sigh in defeat.

‘Oh Faerghus, how cruel can you be?’ Ashe thought sullenly.

As each minute passed, Ashe’s thoughts raced faster and faster, each crash of thunder and lightning urging him to tell the valet to stop the carriage in a vain effort to stay safe. After all, there was no knowing how much the carriage and their steed could take.

“It seems to be that time of year then.” Ashe sighed in dismay. “I did not expect that the rainy season would arrive so early. Just goes to show how fickle Faerghus weather is. Don’t you think so, Ignatz?”

“It’s definitely nothing like living in the alliance that’s for sure. I kind of miss how warm it was back home. It feels like I should have appreciated it a bit more despite how humid it can get.” Ignatz pulled his cloak tighter over himself as he gazed out the window, flinching back when the lightning flashed.

“I agree with Ignatz.” Raphael let out a big yawn, waking up from his nap. “Even though Maya can get antsy when it’s summer, she’d rather spend the day cooling off by the river instead of travelling up north. Ah, of course, no offense, Ashe.”

“None taken, Raphael. I do agree it can get really dreary during this time of year. Really, the best time to visit Faerghus is spring. Just the perfect amount of warm and cold.” Ashe sorely wished it had been spring instead.

“Is that an invitation, Ashe? Maya would love to visit in the spring! Of course, Ignatz and I will be coming as well. The more the merrier!” Raphael’s laugh never failed to lighten up the atmosphere.

“Take it however you like!” Ashe smiled, eyes twinkling at the idea. “I’ll be sure to free up my time to show you around. I may be a knight now but I’m sure I’ll have a bit of free time when you guys come visit. There are so many places I want to show you. I know a place that serves the most delicious beef stew. Really, you must try it.”

A knock at the window caught their attention, the valet pointing them to a lone shack hidden in a nearby forest.

“My good sirs, I think it would be best we find shelter for tonight. I doubt this carriage can hold on for any longer.” The valet shouted over the roar of the rain. “Surely, someone might live there right? Maybe they could provide us shelter.”

“That’s a good idea. We’ll compensate them if they’d allow us.” Ignatz sighed in relief.

“Thank the goddess!” Raphael cheered. “Looks like we can rest easy now. At least it’s better than just stopping in the middle of the road.”

“I hope we don’t burden them whoever they may be. Though, judging by this storm, I’d say they wouldn’t mind too much…hopefully.” Ashe pondered.

“I hope so too. I don’t even know how much longer I can hold on. This storm is too strong for my liking.” Ignatz peered out the window, unease swirling in his belly as he watched the storm fall down in heavy bursts.

The stormfall had almost shrouded the whole area in foggy grey, blurring the far away towns into obscurity. Ashe tried not to think of the old tales his parents had imparted to him when he was a child. They had told him that storms only invited danger, the most terrifying and the cruelest beasts. Needless to say, it had been effective in dissuading Ashe and his siblings from playing out in the heavy rain.

Ashe shook his head free of those thoughts, willing himself to be brave in the face of an unforgiving storm.

The old shack was steadily coming into view, just several yards away from their carriage. With a loud shout, the valet urged the mare to trot faster to the shack, safety and comfort just barely within their grasp. Distantly, Ashe could hear the nasty squeak of the carriage wheels, as if on the verge of collapsing or breaking off.

‘Just please hold on. Just a little bit more, _please_.’ Ashe prayed.

A sudden flash of lightning made all of them flinch, the valet screaming at its proximity. Ashe felt his heart stutter in fright just as it crashed.

“Please, sit tight!” The valet hollered. “I’ll bring us to the cottage in a minute!”

“Be careful!” Ashe shouted back. He made note to tip the valet handsomely after this trip. The man had more courage than he ever had.

With a loud screech, the carriage came to a halt, a knock at the window signalling their party that they had arrived safely.

Ignatz and Ashe breathed a sigh of relief, grateful that the trial was over. Raphael put on an easy smile as he stretched, relief washing over his features.

As they disembarked from the carriage, Ashe studied the shack in front of them. It looked well built despite its simplicity. Judging from its exterior, its walls were built from hardwood, carefuly stacked together to form thick walls. A lit lantern hung on a nook by the door, oil full to the brim. A lone mare rested at a makeshift stable just right beside it, with plenty of food and water set out in front of it. Further at the side of the shack was what looked to be a small garden, filled with herbs and vegetables.

‘Whoever lived here lived quite peacefully.’ Ashe thought idly. The owner looked to be quite self-sufficient, growing and hunting his own food, if the lone lance by the door was any indication.

With a shy knock at the door, Ignatz called out.

“Hello? We would just like to humbly request for shelter from the storm if you would be so kind.”

No answer.

“Maybe you should knock louder, Ignatz. Here, let me try.” Raphael gave a few resolute knocks at the door. “Hello! Anybody there?”

Still no answer.

“Huh…” Ashe’s shoulders slumped, the idea of shelter slowly becoming a pipe dream instead. “Someone should be there, right? No one in their right mind must be out and about with this storm.”

“Maybe we should try opening it? Force ourselves in? What if they’re asleep?” Raphael reached out for the door, hand pushing at the wood with relative ease. “Oh…it’s open.”

“I really don’t think this is such a good idea. Doesn’t this count as trespassing? Won’t the owner be mad?” Ignatz fretted over the situation.

Thunder roared once again, causing all of them to jump in their place.

“Well, if it’s open then we’ll just have to deal with the owner’s anger. I’d rather not stay out here. Inside is the safest bet.” The valet pushed the door open, revealing a dimly lit room.

And no one inside.

“Well? No one’s here.” The valet had already made his way inside. “We’ll just make sure that we leave this shack the way we found it.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Raphael stepped across the doorframe, wringing the rain out of his cloak.

With a shrug, they all followed the valet’s lead, shuffling inside the shack in haste, eager to get out of the relentless storm brewing outside.

It was warm.

The fireplace still flickered with flames, enveloping the whole room in comforting warmth. Candlesticks were lit in every corner, lighting up the room in dim yellow.

The place looked lived in, a bit homey even.

There were thick furs placed over the modest bed in the far corner of the room, looking every bit as inviting to a traveler worn out from their journey. Some lances rested on the rack in the corner, polished and shining as the light from the candles bounced off the steel. A chest was situated at the foot of the bed, slightly opened to reveal plain clothes folded neatly atop each other. On the other side of the room stood a tall bookshelf, numerous books stacked together, worn out and used. And just beside it was the fireplace with cooking ware neatly hanging on the wall.

At first glance, there was nothing out of the ordinary. But upon closer inspection, marks littered the walls near the bed, as if talons scratched the wood.

Ashe could only look closer in curiosity, a feeling of dread settled in his gut as he studied the marks, one hand reaching out to feel the scratches.

“How did these get here?” Ashe wondered, pulling back his hand from the marks.

“Ashe, you’re just overthinking it.” Raphael kept to his jovial attitude. “The guy must have scratched it from polishing those lances on the bed.

“You’re right, you’re right.” Ashe conceded. It was the simplest explanation, after all. “This weather must be messing with me.”

Once they all have sufficiently dried themselves, they huddled near the fire, eager to warm up their bodies from the cold, biting rain.

“So, how long do you guys think we’ll have to wait until the storm clears up?” Ignatz asked as he rubbed his palms together.

“Not too long I hope.” Ashe supplied. Frankly, Ashe could not tell. Storms like these were fickle after all.

Suddenly, lightning once again flashed, this time far too close for comfort, sending the shack shaking on its foundations.

“A-at least, we’re safe for now.” Ignatz shivered in fright. “I think.”

Another crash sounded, now too close to just be a few yards away from the shack. However, the sound itself was different, far from the crashes they had heard in the middle of their journey.

It sounded like a loud thump on the door.

Ashe could not help but think of the tales from his childhood.

“W-what was that?” Ashe quickly got to his feet, reaching for his bow and dagger. It would not do well for them to be complacent. But in Ashe’s heart, he wished that it was only the owner who had made the sound, returning to his home in fatigue.

“I’ll check it out.” Raphael was so brave. “You guys worry too much. It’s probably the owner of this place.”

Each step Raphael took sent his heart racing, dread crawling in his vains as he held his breath, waiting for Raphael to open the door.

Nonchalantly, Raphael pushed the door open.

They all gasped.

Before them was a wolf, its body was twice the size of a bear, tall and imposing. It towered over Raphael as it stood on its hindlegs, its massive physique betraying what was probably unbridled strength, enough to crush all of them with even the slightest amount of force. Tusks rested on either side of its snout, large and sharp, emphasizing the sharp teeth hidden underneath its snout.

It breathed heavily, puffs of air dispersing in front of its face.

It was terrifying.

It was _angry_.

Before Raphael could tell them to get back, the beast took a swipe at him. With both hands, Raphael quickly caught beast’s paws, pushing back futilely against its monstrous strength. To his dismay, the beast’s strength was too overwhelming. It gripped back at Raphael’s hands, squeezing Raphael’s hands with an audible crack. Raphael could only flinch in pain, the pain weakening him and allowing the beast to fully fight back. Before Raphael could even move out of the way, the beast pushed him back, tossing him across the room, effectively knocking him unconscious.

“Raphael!” They all exclaimed. The valet quickly headed over to Raphael’s side, trying to nudge him awake.

Without even a moment to think, Ashe and Ignatz quickly moved grab their weapons, determined to defend themselves from the beast. However, the beast moved fast despite its massive size, quickly maneuvering itself between them, pushing them apart as it slashed its claws across Ignatz’s chest, blood dripping in heavy streaks.

Ignatz fell down on his back from the force of it, causing him to howl in pain. Ignatz could not bring himself to get back on his feet, only managing to bring a hand up to stop himself from bleeding profusely.

“Ignatz!” Ashe shouted in worry.

Tears steadily streamed down Ignatz face as the beast mounted itself over him, mouth opening wide as if getting ready to devour him. Ignatz pushed back at the beast weakly, using one hand to stab at the beast in a futile attempt to deter its advance.

The beast didn’t even flinch.

Ashe felt his stomach drop at the sight, adrenaline coursing through his veins as he unsheathed his dagger. Quick on his feet, Ashe lunged towards the beast stabbing the beast deeply on its shoulder, causing the monster to howl in pain.

Ashe stepped back from the beast as it turned around, its lone blue eye glaring at him.

Ashe felt a shiver run down his spine at that instant.

With a gulp, Ashe taunted.

“I’m not afraid of you! Come at me!” His comrades were in no state to battle. He had no other choice than to lure the beast away to buy them time.

Now with the beast’s attention on him, Ashe ran outside the shack, taunting the beast as he did. Unaware of the deep hole along his path, Ashe slipped, falling face first into the mud, a sharp pain shooting right up his leg from ankle.

Still, Ashe crawled his way, determined to save his friends from the foul beast. Unfortunately, the beast was quick as ever, its paws grabbing at one of Ashe’s legs, dragging him closer. Ashe kicked and screamed, trying to pry off the beast’s grip on his legs with his foot.

Once Ashe was close enough, the beast then clutched the front of his shirt with one paw, the other wrapping itself around his neck. Ashe struggled in its hold, trying to pry the claws embedding themselves on his neck. Ashe delivered a weak punch to the beast’s face, lack of oxygen diminishing his strength.

The beast only huffed, seemingly unimpressed. Its lone blue eye studied Ashe thoroughly, as if assessing the best way to devour its prey. Ashe could feel himself losing consciousness, the beast blurring in his vision. For a moment, the beast released its hold on his neck, allowing Ashe to breathe. Ashe immediately gulped air as he was released. However, as quick as the beast was to release its hold on his neck, the beast moved to squeeze Ashe’s arm, breaking it, causing Ashe to scream in excruciating pain.

‘Is this it?’ Ashe thought deliriously. He had only become a knight six moons ago. Yet he was to meet his end at the hands of a wandering beast.

How unfitting for a knight.

Suddenly, the beast howled in pain, releasing its hold on Ashe, sending Ashe falling down to the ground.

As Ashe’s vision refocused, he was met with the sight of Ignatz who was helping him up and Raphael pulling out an axe off of the beast’s hide. .

“Ashe! We have to move quickly!” Ignatz pulled him up in haste. The wounds on his chest seemed to have stopped bleeding, pink scars left in its wake. “The valet is waiting in the carriage. We must hurry and escape.”

“Alright.” Once Ashe got to his feet, they quickly made their way to the carriage with Raphael in tow, quickly filing inside the carriage to make their escape.

Once all have them have settled, the valet snapped the leads of his mare, ever so eager to get of the area and to actual safety.

And so without looking back, they ran.

“That’s…all I could remember.” Ashe told him apologetically.

They sat across each other in the dining hall, picking at their lunch bit by bit. It had been a long time since Felix had last been to the monastery, several months in fact. It was odd considering that the Church had so many requests, and these requests were the very reason for the existence of Felix’s livelihood. It was a coincidence that his mercenary work had rarely brought him to serve the Church.

“I see. Though, a shack in the middle of nowhere is not exactly specific but at least we know it’s somewhere in Tailtean Plains.” Peering out the window, Felix tried to imagine the place. Cold, dreary, abandoned but lived in. It was odd that such a person would live in such a secluded place. Surely, they would have moved out as soon as they’ve caught wind of a beast on the prowl for prey.

“I apologize but it is truly all we know.” Ashe shook his head in dismay. “I hope whoever was living in that shack had already relocated. It’s far too risky to even wander there, let alone actually living near such a beast.”

“Well, after I’m done with it, at least that person can rest easy, along with the others who may wander there unplanned.” Felix was determined to exterminate the beast. It had lived far too long and caused too much trouble.

“Felix, are you sure you should be taking this mission on your own? Wouldn’t it be easier to have company?” Ashe’s brows drew tight in worry. “I can’t in good faith leave you to fend off such a thing by yourself…If only I can heal up more quickly.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Felix cleaned up his tray. Ashe’s intel was not much but it was all he had to go by. He was thankful for Ashe’s help nonetheless. “I assure you if things go south I’ll retreat.”

“Felix, just be careful…” Ashe’s voice was soft, fright shaking the words he spoke. “That creature…It was nothing like we’ve seen before. I think—No, I’m _certain_ that those who slither in the dark may have had a hand in creating that monster.”

“It seems like it. A creature such as that should have been a thing of the past. To think that one still managed to survive after the war…” Felix could not wrap his mind around it. It had been a year since they had last heard of the existence of such beasts. Surely defeating those who slither in the dark had exterminated them.

“Just stay safe, Felix. I know you can handle yourself but that _beast_ is no ordinary foe.” Ashe cautioned, his voice taking on a serious tone. “Why don’t you take my vulneraries. Surely, they’d be of help to you in case.”

“Thanks.” Felix stood up with tray, preparing to leave. “I’ll return in about a week or two.”

“Stay safe, my friend.”

* * *

The moon was hypnotic tonight.

It shone brightly in the sky, its light catching on the dews resting idly on blades of grass, washing the plains into a light glimmerring field.

Tailtean plains was ethereal in nights like this, a far cry from the battlefield it once was during the war.

This late at night, all seemed to be at peace. Even the slightest rustle of grass seemed to echo in the fields along with the soft chirping of crickets and stray birds. It was evident that Tailtean plains and all that inhabited it was asleep, unbothered by the apparent beast lurking in its wake.

Felix let out a yawn, the atmosphere lulling him to feel the slightest bit drowsy, his horse’s movements almost lulling him to sleep.

Felix was awfully familiar with this road, having taken it numerous times when he was just a mere child, the rowdy son of Duke Fraldarius visiting his friend, the Prince. He remembered peering out the window of the carriage often, watching as Castle Fhirdiad grew in size in the distance, the carriage bringing him closer and closer to his friend and his older brother.

That felt like a lifetime ago.

Though a ‘lifetime’ was not far off considering how things have played out.

It was an easy road to traverse, having been used by so many merchants with their caravans on their way to make bank at Fhirdiad. So it was no surprise that it had only taken him a few hours to finally reach the woods, the very place Ashe had so described in his story.

Nothing looked out of place for the most part. The lantern hanging on the nook by the door remained lit, moths dancing around it, attracted to the flame. The mare at the makeshift stable laid asleep, undisturbed. The windows glowed a dim yellow, evidence of the light lit from within.

It was every bit a normal cottage and not at all the battlefield that Ashe had endured.

Hopping off his steed, Felix scanned the area, ears open to even the slightest bit of sound. Frankly, though he did have an idea of what he was up against, Felix felt slightly underprepared. The plan was to catch the beast off guard and end it quick with one swing of his blade.

Simple.

Straightforward.

But his instincts told him to be wary, there was no telling what could happen if the beast was even more of a formidable foe than what Ashe had imparted to him.

Suddenly, he heard a loud howl, the hairs at the back of his neck standing up as he scanned the vicinity of the shack. Another howl immediately sounded after, as if beckoning Felix to come find its source.

‘That must be it.’ With a resolute huff, Felix followed the sound, moving as silent as possible so as to not draw attention.

Every few seconds, Felix would hear the telltale sounds of a struggle, growls and hisses after each audible rustle of grass. Soon enough, Felix found what he was looking for. And it sat hunched on itself, its back facing towards him, as it tore at the flesh of an innocent deer.

With a steadying breath, Felix unsheathed his sword, adrenaline setting his body alight with strength. Felix crept up slowly behind it, mindful of any rough patches on his path to avoid drawing the beast’s attention. Once he deemed himself close enough, he raised his blade, ready to bring the beast to its end with quick swipe at its neck.

Before Felix could fully bring down the blade, the beast turned around catching the blade between its teeth, biting hard on the steel, ultimately cracking the blade in two.

“Shit.” Felix felt his blood run cold from the sight.

With an angry growl, the beast swiped at Felix’s legs, sending him to his feet, leaving deep gashes on his shins. Felix immediately let go of broken blade, reaching for his other one still trapped in its sheath at his waist.

The monster howled, scaring away any animal near. It stood on its hindlegs now, taking on a far more threatening stature. It quickly pinned Felix down on his back as it breathed heavily down his neck.

‘No, you won’t put me down so easily.’ Felix gritted his teeth as he summoned electricity through his arm.

The beast immediately recoiled from the shock, stepping back from Felix, allowing Felix the opportunity to stab it right through its stomach. The monster howled in pain, blood steadily streaming down its torso.

Felix pulled the blade back, jumping back as he prepared to fight back against the beast’s vengeance. With a snarl, the beast lunged at him, claws out to tear Felix apart, limb from limb.

Felix had underestimated the beast’s speed as he dodged, the beast’s claws catching hold of his right shoulder, its paw squeezing it, piercing its sharp claws through his flesh.

Felix cried out in pain from the force of it, causing his hand to loosen its grip over his sword. The beast then pulled its claw back, tearing Felix’s flesh in the process, blood dripping profusely from the gash, and with another lunge, the beast tore its claws through Felix's torso, leaving trails of blood in its wake. Felix could do no more than go down on his knees, hand clutching his shoulder tight.

This beast was impressive, injuring the side which he used for his swordplay.

‘Still a beast.’ Felix thought, determination setting itself in his chest.

Felix quickly reached for his sword, ignoring the searing pain on his shoulder. He quickly slashed at the beast’s legs, using its own strategy against it. The beast flinched, stepping back, allowing Felix to use his momentum to lunge a stab at the beast’s side.

The beast caught the blade as it pierced through its side, snarling at the pain. With a frustrated growl, the beast pushed Felix back with one giant paw, effectively sending Felix to the ground.

Lying on the ground, Felix could not help but notice that dawn was fast approaching. The night sky had quickly turned into a lighter hue, the sun almost peeking out from its place on the horizon.

Before Felix could even get back to his feet, the monster hovered over him, raising its claws to swipe at him one final time. Hastily, Felix brought his sword in front of him, pushing back against the beast’s relentless paws, adrenaline serving as the fuel for him to drive back the beast with all his strength.

Up close, the beast looked like an odd mix between a wild boar and a winter wolf. Its appearance far from the beasts they had dealt with during the war. Felix felt anger coil in his belly at the thought of those villains. To think they had managed to create such a menacing beast, it made Felix so unbelievably angry, knowing that many had fallen because of these monsters.

Sweat beaded at his forehead as he continued to push back with all his might.

Like this, he could see the sun slowly rising from behind the beast, crawling up in the sky inch by inch. Its warm rays slowly spread throughout the woods, strays beams peeking through the trees.

Once the rays of light touched the monster, it recoiled as if burnt by the warmth of dawn, curling into itself as it writhed in pain. Its screams were chilling, all loud roars and the sound of gnashing teeth. As it struggled to stay on its feet, Felix took the chance and swiped one leg at its limbs, sending the monster down onto its back. It didn’t stop wailing in pain, its screams only increased in volume, morphing into a sound akin to a human screaming in pain.

Seeing this opportunity, Felix quickly shot to his feet, gripping his sword with resolution, blade ready to bring the beast to its demise. He positioned himself over the beast, aiming his sword right at the center of its chest. Before the blade could meet its chest, the beast swiped at Felix’s legs, causing him to fall flat on his back, his head bumping audibly on the ground. Felix could only flinch in pain, the marks on his legs bleeding from the beast’s claws and his shoulder still sore from the claw that had embedded itself in his shoulder.

The beast mounted itself over him, its mouth wide open, ready to devour Felix. Felix gritted his teeth as he pushed back the monster’s snout, gloved hand gripping the beast’s snout as his other reached for his discarded sword. The beast was relentless, growling in frustration as Felix pushed back against it giant jaw, even as rays of light burned its body with its heat.

As strong as this monster was, Felix knew that it was steadily growing tired, judging from the weakening force of its blows.

Soon, the sun had finally reached its spot in the sky, bathing the plains into a bright gleaming yellow.

The sun’s rays now enveloped the beast, burning every inch of its body as it futilely fought back against Felix. The scent of burnt skin and meat invaded Felix’s senses. The scent was pungent enough to make Felix want to vomit. Felix could not even move away, pinned as he was on the ground by the weight of the monster thrashing above him.

Felix watched as the beast writhed above him, its yowls echoing those of a dying man. It seemed that the sun was burning away its body, fur steadily disappearing as the beast clawed at its body, desperate to ease its pain. However, the closer Felix looked, the more evident that its fur had retreated, revealing smooth pale skin, scratches and blood littered all over its pale expanse.

Felix could only watch dumbfoundedly as more and more scarred skin revealed itself, the beast’s paws steadily morphing into a man’s hands, its torso revealing the scarred expanse of human flesh, and its snout retreating to its face, revealing a human face contorted in agonizing pain.

Felix felt a chill run down his spine, hearing the loud cries of a man tortured by the warmth of the sun. As the sun burned down the last of the beast on the man, the man breathed heavily, clawing at his arms as if searching for the comfort of the fur that had once covered him. Blood dripped from where his nails scraped his skin, leaving trails of red all of over his limbs. Soon, the man’s cries weakened to pained whimpers and gasped sobs. His tired hands gripped himself instead of clawing away at his skin. The once dark mane of the monster was now a brilliant gold hanging over the man’s face.

Felix was shocked.

To think that the beast that prowled Tailtean Plains was but a man.

Deciding against outright killing the so called beast, Felix sat up cautiously, wary of the man’s reaction. All he could hear now were soft whimpers and sobs. He carefully reached out to touch the man’s shoulder, numerous questions dancing on the tip of his tongue as he observed him. Before Felix could touch him however, the man slumped over, exhaustion washing over him as he slipped away from consciousness.

Felix flinched as the man’s head collided with the wound on his stomach, the man’s cheek tainted with the red of Felix’s blood. Gingerly, Felix cradled the man’s head, fingers carefully pushing away the locks that covered his face.

Felix felt his stomach drop as he recognized him.

A scar running down his right eye, eyelid slightly obscuring the brilliant blue of his remaining eye, sharp nose, and blond furrowed brows, it couldn’t be anyone else. Not when the strength of the beast was far too powerful, far too _familiar_ to just be a man, a stray soldier who may have tinkered with the power of a crest stone.

It could not be anyone else.

Felix could only sit in shock as he cradled him, a man who had long been lost to the war, a man he had once called his best friend, his king, _Dimitri_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have been wanting to write this fic for the longest time. It's my pet project lmao.
> 
> I'm on [twitter](https://twitter.com/catefish_)
> 
> Anyway, kudos and comments are greatly appreciated.


	2. Paths crossed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the full moon, Dimitri wakes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter warnings: Raw animal eating, not too graphic. Attempted Murder.

Dimitri felt invigorated.

His body teemed with incomprehensible strength, almost bursting out, threatening destruction even from the slightest movement. His body was encased in what could only be terrifying armor, far too sturdy to be penetrated by any common blade.

Gone were the age old aches in his body, every scar and every wound concealed under thick skin and rough fur. His hands, if they were even worthy to be called such, were giant, capable of enveloping, _crushing_ , anything that would dare venture near his grasp. His senses were so incredibly fine-tuned, each soft rustle and each fleeting scent cloying at his senses as he stalked around the periphery of his home, mindlessly searching for any sign of life, of _prey_.

The faint sound of crushed grass teased his ears, setting his senses alight.

‘Found you.’ His mind commented with glee.

The fresh scent of blood wafted over him, lulling him into a hypnotized haze, his mouth immediately salivating from just a whiff of that sweet scent, his stomach growling in ominous hunger in turn.

‘Wounded. How unfortunate.’ His mind muttered darkly.

He followed the scent with eagerness, saliva dripping down his snout the closer he went. He crept cautiously, wary of making even the slightest sound. He had long mastered the art of a hunt, maximizing each movement, honing each tactic to perfection. It did not take long for him to find himself in a clearing, and right at the center of it was a lone doe, his prey, panting from exhaustion as it stood on its wounded legs.

Without a moment’s thought, he charged towards the doe before it could slip from his grasp, clutching at its body with ferocity, his claws digging into its once sleek fur. The deer had let out a shriek, struggling in his hold in futility. Distantly, he heard the sound of other animals making their escape, abandoning the deer for the sake of their own safety.

‘Animals.’ He thought idly. There was never any honor in abandoning companions. But it was to be expected from such lowly creatures. Survival was the name of the game, not friendship, not family, not chivalry.

‘There is no point in trying.’ He scoffed at the deer, watching as it slowly stilled, watching as blood steadily dripped down his claws.

With just one unhesitating grasp, it was all over.

Grinning to himself, he set it down, tearing at its flesh bit by bit, savoring the delicate tearing of muscle from muscle, and skin from skin.

‘More, more, more.’ His mind chanted as he brought a pound of flesh into his mouth, biting into it like a starved animal.

Well, that was not far from the truth.

His feeble mind deemed that it was far better than eating tasteless meals along with the futile warmth that idly tickled his tastebuds. Eating was a chore. Hunting on the other hand made it worthwhile. While the taste was still sorely lacking, the textures of the meat was beyond compare along with the whole process of procuring such meat.

Hunting entertained him and fulfilled that twisted thirst in his heart. He could almost imagine his prey, _those dastards_ , succumbing to his strength, feeling what was his pure unadulterated rage, his vengeance snapping them in two.

It was beyond gratifying.

As he continued his feast, he caught wind of another scent, this time far too clean to be a mere wandering animal. His ears perked up on the telltale sound of grass crushed under boots, his instincts warning him of a silent presence hovering from behind him.

‘Cocky.’ The foolish human probably thought he could best him with just a sneaky strike.

He underestimated him, a hulking beast that had murdered hundreds of prey without mercy and without difficulty, a beast who could fell any opponent with his eyes closed, a beast who, if he had been given the chance, would have successfully accomplished his revenge.

Did this fool think him to be just as any other animal?

That notion made his blood boil.

He heard the soft, almost imperceptible sound of the man raising his blade, determined to end him in just one swipe.

‘Child's play.’ He almost wanted to scoff at the man’s tactics.

With a huff to himself, he turned his head catching the brave blade in between his teeth, watching as a determined face twisted into terrified shock.

“Shit.” The fool cursed under his breath as he watched his precious sword be cracked in two. He felt himself smirk at the man’s reaction in utter glee.

With a calculated swipe at his legs, the man fell down to his back, blood smearing the once pristine green of the grass. The sight of it never failed to be fascinating. The ease of sending an opponent down on their knees, the resounding echoes of their pain, and the utter joy in passing judgment to those who would dare cross him was delectable, igniting a vile flame within his chest.

With a snarl, he lunged towards him, trapping the man beneath his hold, closing his hand over his ribcage idly. Dimitri watched as the man thrashed beneath him, ever persistent in extricating himself from his iron grip. He struggled and screamed, clawing at the paws that gripped his body like a vice, his screams tempered by heavy gasps for breath.

Dimitri looked over him in amusement, noting with triumphant glee the tears that have gathered in his eyes.

Oh how he loved this.

The thrill of having his opponent’s life within his grasp, one moment away from teaching them who exactly they were dealing with.

And so, he let his paw rest over his chest, placing more and more of his weight onto the man ever so slowly, taking advantage of his massive size and demonstrating the strength that belied his fierce exterior. He pressed his face closer and closer, watching as amber eyes widened in panic. Dimitri felt his grin grow wider as he inched closer, almost a breath away from the man’s face, entertained by the look of pure terror on his countenance.

He could end it all for him right at this very moment. With just one resolute grasp, he would have rendered him dead and motionless, a mere used up plaything.

But that was not entertaining at all.

Beastly as he was, he was far more drawn to savoring the moment, intent on drawing those agonized gasps and shouts out of his prey and relishing in the thrill of it all. Each sob made him smile, each garbled shout made him laugh. It was like watching a revered play just in the palm of his hands.

 _Fun_ , as one would simply put it.

He watched as amber eyes blinked up at him, tears falling down the man’s cheeks. Despite his glistening tears, the man —No, the _solider_ — sent him an adamant glare, gritting his teeth as pushed his paw away with whatever might he had left.

‘Too weak, too foolish.’ He thought to himself as he pressed his paw harder on the man’s sternum, causing the man to choke.

A pained sob fell out of the man’s lips, the sound ringing in his ears with utmost clarity.

He stopped.

Cold dread flooded his veins as he recognized him.

Raven locks framing sharp amber eyes, pale skin tainted pink from exertion…it could not be, it should _not_ be.

But his body had moved before he could ponder on it even more, the revelation late to his body’s baser instincts.

‘No, no, no!’ He screamed at himself, his shouts falling on deaf ears.

His paw continued its tirade, slowly and agonizingly wrapping itself firmly around the man’s ribcage. Dimitri could do no more than allow his hand to grip the man—Felix, his mind cruelly supplied—tight, a slave to his own body, a bystander to the potential murder of his once friend. He was utterly powerless, succumbing to the will of the beast—his own very will.

In a few moments, he would become the cause of Felix’s demise.

Felix who had turned his back on him all those years ago.

Felix who had taken the hand of the woman he so scorned.

Felix who did not even look back despite his pleas.

‘Retribution is what this is.’ The thought chilled him to his bones.

He felt Felix’s bones crack beneath his hold, causing his friend to scream in pain, the sound twisting Dimitri’s insides violently.

He wanted to vomit.

He wanted to pull away.

He wanted to stop.

Why can’t he stop?

“No!” Dimitri protested vehemently. “No, Felix does not deserve this!”

Try as he might, the hand holding Felix down did not falter, even further tightening its hold over his friend. More tears fell down Felix’s eyes, his face growing paler and paler as the seconds ticked by. Dimitri could only look on in horror.

‘He’s not our Felix, not anymore…and not any longer.’ His mind reminded him.

And with one last grasp, he was gone.

  
  
  
  
  


With a shout, Dimitri sat up, arm shooting forward on instinct, gasping for air as he struggled to ground himself in reality. His heart beat rapidly in his chest, still shaking at his core. The image of Felix breathing his last was seared into his mind, guilt and grief pooling in his belly as he relived the moment.

The memory twisted Dimitri’s heart violently, a choked sob escaping his chest as he sat in sorrow.

He actually did it.

He killed him.

His hands shook violently as he gripped his woolen blanket, knuckles turning white and tears falling down his face.

He was every bit the beast that Felix feared, maybe even worse.

“You’re alive.” A familiar voice greeted him, calm and even. The words rang clearly in his mind, the tenor of the voice cleansing the pervasive fog in his mind.

He turned his attention to his bedside, finding Felix himself sitting on a chair, covered in bandages, an apple and a dagger in hand, _alive_.

He could not even breathe a sigh of relief, terrified that he would disappear if he so much blinked.

“Felix, I…” Dimitri started, his voice shaking. “I hardly know where to begin…”

“Well, I was going to heal you up but your wounds have already closed and scarred before I could even try.” Felix returned his attention back to the apple, carefully peeling it with his dagger. Though Felix tried to hide it, he saw the way his hands trembled as they moved.

“I…” Dimitri was still in shock, relief and remorse washing over him all at once.

Felix was alive.

“Ashe, Ignatz and Raphael are safe in case you were wondering.” Felix offered the apple to him, bandaged hands catching his attention.

Right.

Felix was alive but he was in no way safe.

If his dream, _his memory_ , had served right, he had injured him seriously in their scuffle last night. He could remember flashes of his claws tearing through his flesh, the way he struggled under his hold, and his face when he was on the cusp of his demise.

“Felix…you should leave.” Felix had no business being near him. And Dimitri had no business being in his company after what he had done.

“ _What?_ ” Anger flashed in Felix’s expression.

“There is no reason for you to stay here, much less any benefit from being in my company.” Dimitri was beyond certain that misfortune would only follow Felix if he stayed with him any longer. His injuries spoke volumes of such a danger.

“Benefit? Don’t make me laugh. You truly think I would have such a petty reason to stay.” Felix’s words were sharp, cutting through his words as he would with his blade. “You astound me.”

“I am dangerous, Felix.” Dimitri warned him. His words were immediately met with a scowl. “Surely, you know now that I am not a simple beast. Not anymore.”

“Of course, I am aware of that.” Felix scoffed. His brows drew tight as he pinned Dimitri with a glare. “But even if you were a simple beast I would have—“

Felix bit his own tongue, uncertain of venturing forward with that trail of thought. With a resolute huff, he continued.

“I looked for you for five years, boar.” Felix met his gaze with his own, honesty bare on his expression. Dimitri watched him choose his words. “Five years following what could be a trail gone cold. Honestly, I had given up at that point. But months later, Ingrid sent me a letter telling me to come back, that _you_ were alive. Then even later, I would then hear you’ve managed to lead an army to battle in Gronder. Your body counted among those who have perished.”

Dimitri was speechless. Felix had searched for him. The notion was hard to imagine considering Felix’s blatant dislike of him. The day he had moved to the Black Eagles made that clear. And so Dimitri could only listen, trying to soak in this new information.

“All this time, you were just here in this old shack.” Felix heaved a tired sigh as he shook his head. “It still hasn’t sunk in. I thought you were _slaughtered_. And yet here you are, just making a life for yourself in some obscure forest in Tailtean Plains.”

Frankly, Dimitri could say the same to Felix. Seeing him alive felt like a dream. He had expected to never cross paths with him again. In fact, he had hardly entertained the prospect of seeing any of his comrades again, resigning himself to a quiet life in isolation.

“I just can’t understand why didn’t you tell _any_ of us you were _alive?_ ” Came Felix’s exasperated question, confusion swimming in his gaze as he searched Dimitri’s face for an answer.

It was simple.

“I already told you, I am no ordinary beast.” Dimitri explained. “I have killed hundreds by now, Felix. The blood on my hands cannot easily be cleansed, beast or not. Even just by being within my vicinity, I was beyond capable of harm.”

Felix remained silent as Dimitri continued.

“I found this to be the best for everyone. I cannot control this nor can I be killed to end this. I highly doubt the most powerful mage could even undo it. This is the only way to keep the people safe.”

“And so you decided that isolating yourself from the world was the best course of action? Don’t make me laugh. This is the bare minimum of a solution.” Felix folded his arms across his chest, unimpressed.

“News of my survival would only create unrest. You _know_ that, Felix.” Dimitri leveled Felix with a serious look. “After the war, I had suspected everyone had made their peace with it, my loss that is. Life went on, and Fódlan— Faerghus is already recovering. There is no need to trouble yourself with my existence when you have all built peace for yourselves.”

“You fucking idiot.” Felix seethed as he shot up from his seat, his hands gripping Dimitri’s collar.

“Felix—” Dimitri let himself be pulled up by Felix.

“Stop being naïve! You don’t have the _slightest_ idea of what Faerghus was like after you died!” Felix looked at him with anger. “Everything was in ruins. People could hardly look to anyone for help. And that was not even the worst of it!”

Felix’s eyes shone with raw fury.

“ _You knew_ we could’ve helped you! Even now, we could still help you find a way to fix all this but you and your stubborn head!“ His words were sharp and biting. Tears were threatening to fall from his eyes. “Your kingdom needed you and yet—”

“And here I thought you deemed me a beast unworthy of being king.” Dimitri almost wanted to laugh. Hadn’t Felix made it clear all those years ago that he was only donning the façade of a prince? That he was a monster who relished in the seeing the blood of his enemies. That he was nothing but a boar intent on leading his country to ruin on his path to vengeance.

“Stop changing the subject!” Felix fumed.

“Well, what would you have me do, Felix?” Dimitri shot back, his voice rising in volume.“Faerghus is no more. There is no throne to ascend, no country to protect, no enemy to take vengeance on! I have nothing to live for, much less a reason to even survive.”

“Boar—!” Dimitri spoke before he could let Felix protest even further.

“The Church has long made it clear that it was capable of securing Fódlan’s future. There is no need for me.” Dimitri spoke lowly. He had quickly grown tired of this conversation. What was even Felix’s purpose with this? “I suggest you keep your words lest you waste your breath on a dead man.”

“You’re pathetic. To think you’ve fallen this low that you can’t even find a reason to survive without relying on what others want!” His grip on his collar grew tighter, bringing his face to closer to Felix’s own. “You disgust me. To think people had wanted you to become their king, only for you to turn your back on them at the slightest obstacle!”

“Hah! You dare speak to me of duty! To hear such words from you, I would have never imagined this.” Dimitri spat bitterly.

“ _You damn boar_ —!” Felix broke off with a gasp, expression twisting in pain, his grip on Dimitri faltering.

Dimitri watched as blood pooled in Felix’s shoulder, red crawling ever so slowly over the white of the bandages he had wrapped around himself. Potent guilt ached in his chest as he looked.

“Felix…you’re bleeding.” Dimitri carefully reached out to him, wrapping his arm behind his back, pulling him to sit on his bed. Felix had flinched when he had accidentally brushed over his wounds.

Dimitri did not know how Felix was even capable of bringing him back to his home considering the extent of his injuries. Judging by his wounds, even Felix’s meager knowledge of faith magic would not be enough to let him regain his full range of motion, much less drag a heavy man several yards back to his home.

What Felix had done concerned him.

“Of course, what else does it look like?” Felix gritted his teeth as he allowed Dimitri to lay him down on the bed.

“I’m getting you a healer.” Dimitri said with finality as he helped Felix prop himself up to lean against the pillow at his bed frame. “We will talk over this again later if you so please.”

“Fine.” Came Felix’s curt reply.

So Dimitri grabbed his travel gear in haste.

And with one last meaningful look at Felix, he left, intent on finding the nearest healer.

  
  
  
  
  


_“I must apologize, magic could only do so much. But I am certain that in a month’s time you’ll be back on your feet.”_

That was what the healer had explained to them once she was done examining Felix’s wounds. Gruesome, almost fatal, were the words she used to describe them. She had looked over him with concern, worry wearing down her brow as she shined her healing magic over his body. She could only shake her head, unhappy that she could not do more.

She had explained that Felix was to be in bed rest for the rest of the month to allow his body to recuperate and to allow the magic to slowly heal his body little by little.

Dimitri watched Felix as he let himself be mended together. He took note of every small tear on his flesh, and every jagged scar that almost refused to stitch together.

Dimitri wore his apology plain on his face.

Once the healer was done, she instructed both of them to treat his wounds with a salve and white magic every morning and every night to facilitate a speedier recovery.

Right before she left, she had asked them to steer clear of the beast, fear shaking her words as she gave her last instructions.

The earlier tension between them had dissipated altogether after the healer’s visit, leaving them to linger in each other’s presence in silence.

With a steadying breath, Dimitri collected himself before pulling out a chair to to sit on beside Felix’s bed.

“Felix…” Dimitri started, wringing his hands together in nervousness. “I must apologize, both for last night as well as for earlier.”

“I must apologize too.” Felix replied, darting his eyes from Dimitri’s. Even then, Dimitri could tell that Felix had meant it. However, between the two, it was certain that Dimitri was the one who had committed more wrongs. “I finally found you after all these years and I all could do was spit distasteful things. I’m sorry.”

“No offense taken, Felix.” Dimitri smiled wryly. “Honestly, I deserved some of that.”

“I deserved the same as well.” Felix had grown and changed so much. Dimitri could not help but wonder what Felix had gone through all these years apart. “But nevermind that, we have more important things to talk about than a sorry excuse of a fight.”

“Well, what would you like to discuss, Felix?” Dimitri rested his elbows on his knees as he leaned closer.

“Could you at least tell me how you got here?” Felix asked simply. Ah, it was best to start at the very beginning, he supposed.

“To tell you the truth, I myself am not so sure.” Dimitri began, running one hand over his hair. “I had assumed I had already breathed my last at Gronder, I was fairly certain of it actually, but to my surprise I had woken up, seemingly unscathed.”

“Where did you wake up? Gronder is a ways away from Tailtean Plains after all.” Felix studied him intently, watching as he grasped at whatever he could recall that fine day.

“Oddly, near Goneril territory.” Dimitri recalled. He had woken up to pitch black darkness, nauseating scents and the echoes of water dripping. “I assumed that I was well…in a basement I suppose but it was certainly not just a basement. As soon as I found it in myself to explore, I opened the door and found bright green lights organized in lines.”

“Go on.” Dimitri saw Felix’s eyes widen at his words.

“Oddly, I searched around and found everyone dead, with everything on the verge of collapse.” Dimitri had found it eerie. Everywhere there were rotting bodies, starkly pale, and no one in sight was left alive. Luckily, he had found a way to escape. He climbed up to the gaping hole in the ceiling, surprised to find familiar plains right as he emerged.

"It’s just as I had thought. Those bastards…”Felix spoke bitterly. "Listen, those people you found there probably experimented on your body to turn you into some sort of living weapon. To think that they'd even unearth your corpse in the off chance that they'd win the war…"

"Who were they?" Dimitri asked curiously.

"The ones behind almost every single disaster in Fódlan. That's who they are." Felix sent him a meaningful look.

Realization dawned on him.

“I assume that includes Duscur?” Felix nodded. White-hot anger erupted in him. “ _Those scoundrels._ ”

“They’ve already been dealt with. So there’s no use wasting your breath on those pathetic fools.” Felix said. “Anyway, how exactly did you find out about this…thing?” Felix gestured to all of him, uncertain on how to describe exactly Dimitri’s condition.

“Well…once I had returned to the surface, I decided to return to Fhirdiad, hoping to retrieve some of my belongings. However…” Truthfully, it still pained Dimitri to remember such an event. That poor old man did not deserve to meet such an end. With a gulp, Dimitri continued. “On my way there, a storm fell and I had no choice but to seek refuge under an old hermit’s roof. I’d wager you could tell what had happened next.”

He had woken to blood stained hands, a disembodied corpse and a vivid nightmare seared into his mind.

He buried him in the clearing, a lone lance marking his grave.

Needless to say, he had never ventured close to any village after that, unless necessary, afraid of what he might do.

He was still the same.

He was as dangerous as he was during that first night. And if Felix’s injuries were anything to go by, he was not merely just an animal in his beastly form. He was a murderer, a slaughterer in every sense of the word.

Dimitri could not help but think Felix would only face worse things if he stays any longer.

“Felix, I truly think its best for you to leave and recuperate somewhere safer.” His blue eye dimmed in regret. “I will help bring you to Fhirdiad if need be. So please.”

“Tch, you heard the healer. I am not to move from this bed as much as possible. Stop sending me away. I’m not intent on going anywhere else.” Felix huffed as he crossed his arms over his chest. Slowly, a pensive look etched itself on his face. "I understand why you wouldn’t want me here. After everything I had done, I imagine you resent me…But to leave you here would just be repeating old mistakes. Nothing would change. So I'm staying."

Felix was determined and stubborn as ever.

Dimitri ran one hand over his hair in frustration.

“Just…what do you want from me?” Dimitri asked, helpless to Felix’s whims.

Suddenly, he felt a weight settle over his head, a simple pat.

“I want you to _live_. Simple as that.” Felix’s voice had gone soft. “Or is that still too complicated for you to understand?”

Felix’s words would echo in his mind for the rest of the day. He remained in disbelief, wondering if he had just imagined those words falling from Felix's lips. Yet, Dimitri could not find it in himself to wish Felix away. In truth, he wanted Felix’s company despite their natural tendency to clash. He yearned for his approval, for him to stay at his side as the years passed by.

Selfish as it was, Dimitri was thankful to be given time to spend with him. However short it may be.

Later that night, Dimitri would repeat those same words over and over in his mind, willing himself to follow Felix’s wishes despite every instinct in his body urging him to push Felix away to safety. But it was difficult not to fall back on old habits, especially when he would find himself watching over Felix, ever observant of his breathing and the way he would flinch if he breathed too deeply.

Dimitri could only bury his head in his hands in remorse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm on [ twitter ](https://twitter.com/catefish_)
> 
> kudos and comments are very much appreciated!


	3. The Beast Wakes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When the beast wakes

It was early in the morning when Felix heard it.

The sunlight had already crept shyly into the room, its rays lighting the room to a soft yellow.

It was a soft whimper of pain followed by a low groan, the sound alerting Felix’s senses, prompting him to sit up quickly, eyes darting to the floor where his companion lay asleep.

Dimitri’s face was scrunched in discomfort, his brows knotting together as he tossed and turned.

‘A nightmare.’ Felix immediately thought. He had his own share of experiences with such dreams. During the war, Sylvain would nudge him awake whenever he thrashed in his sleep, worry gracing his features as Felix opened his eyes.

Another pained whimper tugged at Felix’s heart, urging him to reach out and aid his once friend.

He had no choice.

He could not leave him to his nightmares in good conscience.

And so, Felix shuffled closer to the side of the bed. The bedsheets rustled softly from his movements as his bandaged hand slowly reached out towards Dimitri, stretching as far as he could to nudge him at his cheek.

Dimitri’s hand immediately shot out in retaliation, taking hold of his wrist in an iron grip.

Shocked, Felix gasped at the sudden force of it. The feel of Dimitri’s grip teetered on the edge of comfort, pinprick pain aching in his hand from his grip.

Felix met Dimitri’s gaze. His lone blue eye was narrowed to a thin slit, almost unseeing.

“Boar, let go.” Felix spoke lowly. His voice came out tight, words a chore to say out loud.

He was answered with a low growl and a tightened grip, causing Felix to flinch in pain.

“Boar, come on!” Felix gritted his teeth as he tried to pry his hand away from Dimitri’s grasp. Felix’s heart raced wildly in his chest, his instincts screaming at him to escape. “Boar!”

The beast now sat up, growling lowly as he brought Felix’s hand closer to him, almost pulling Felix out of the bed. The action had jostled his injured shoulder, a sharp pain shooting through his arm as he tried to pull himself free.

“Damn it!” Felix could feel his body straining as he tried to prop himself up before he could fall to the ground.

The beast breathed heavily, snarling as it slowly dragged Felix closer, lone blue eye narrowing even further.

Felix let out a pained groan. His body ached in retaliation, not at all ready to help Felix get out of this tense situation.

“Wake up, Dimitri!” Felix shouted, tears pricking the corners of his eyes.

And suddenly, his hand was freed, blood rushing back to his hand as he toppled onto his back. He flinched, his shoulder taking the brunt of his fall.

“Felix!” Dimitri exclaimed, immediately reaching out to help Felix up.

“I’m fine, boar.” Felix said with a sigh, massaging the hand that Dimitri—no, _the beast_ — had grabbed. His wrist felt the slightest bit sore. His skin glowed a light red from the force of Dimitri’s grip. However, it was nothing magic cannot heal.

“I…” Dimitri looked over him sullenly, careful hands bringing his sore one to rest on his palm as he knelt on the floor in front of him. Dimitri remained silent as he inspected his wrist. With a disappointed sigh, Dimitri allowed his hand to hover over it, shining magic over his wrist with a gentleness he did not expect. “My apologies.”

Felix remained quiet as he watched Dimitri heal his wrist. In truth, Felix did not blame Dimitri one bit for the short incident. Honestly, he should have expected it, considering he had just faced off squarely with the beast itself. He recognized it for what it was, a defense mechanism, an active shield built in to fight off any who would dare slay the beast in its sleep.

It was terrifying how deep seated this darkness was in Dimitri’s being.

Felix made a mental note to ask more about it later, at least once both of them have calmed down.

“I should have expected it.” Dimitri said quietly. “I wish I could have warned you more specifically. But I had no idea that I would hurt you in my sleep…”

“Stop overthinking it.” Felix replied. The pain in his wrist slowly ebbed away. “There’s no need to dwell on such a simple accident.”

Dimitri made no answer to that, choosing to concentrate on healing him. Even silent, Felix could imagine what was going through Dimitri’s mind. The man was probably drafting various reasons to send him away to safety, not too trusting of himself to stay in Felix’s vicinity.

“It can’t be helped. I—” Dimitri spoke lowly, biting back his words. “Be wary of touching me in any manner, Felix.”

“Noted.” Felix assented with a grunt. “But you do realize that while I’m recovering that we have to make contact.”

“Of course.” Dimitri looked at him earnestly. “I will be careful but the same can not be said for you. Please take due care when you are, for lack of a better word, handling me.”

“Right.” Felix had nothing more to say to that. They would end up going in loops if he fired back.

Once Dimitri finished patching up his wrist, he stood up silently, dusting off his pants as he made his way to the modest fireplace in the other side of the room.

“I’m sorry that you’ll have to make do with my cooking for a while. I’m not the best at it unfortunately.” Dimitri took the cooking wares off their hooks as he set about to cook.

“As long as it’s edible.” Surely, the boar could cook something decent. After all, he has been living alone all this time, and from the looks of it, was a tad healthy.

“I’ll try my best.” Dimitri fed more wood to the flames before placing a pot over it, the pot clanging as it met stone. He then poured water into it before covering it with a lid.

It felt odd to watch Dimitri work like this. Felix could hardly recall the last time he had watched Dimitri do such mundane tasks. The sight was something he was definitely unused to. In the academy, Dimitri had avoided such menial tasks, those that required precise control of his strength, afraid of breaking anything delicate.

Now, he watched as Dimitri cut vegetables with nonchalance, maybe even confidence, the soft thudding of the knife against the cutting board proof of his control.

Felix idly wondered what else had changed with Dimitri.

After all, it has been six years since he last saw him. Had he no idea how the late king looked like, he would not have recognized Dimitri that night.

Dimitri was broader and taller, his frame a testament to his brute strength and terrifying capabilities. His lone blue eye was now devoid of that innocent, almost naïve glint he used to have back at the academy. Instead, a somber deep-rooted sadness was set in its place. He was almost every bit a stranger. The only thing that remained the same was his earnestness, his characteristic sincerity coloring his every word and action.

For all his size and strength, Dimitri remained as he once was: too gentle for his own good.

Soon, only the sound of the crackling fire remained. An awkward silence stretched between them as Felix waited for Dimitri to finish. Small talk had never been his strength.

“If you were wondering, I’m cooking a simple vegetable stew.” Dimitri said as he placed the lid on the pot as it boiled.

“Fine by me.” Felix replied. He did not expect anything grand. Anything hearty to fill his belly would be sufficient. But Felix would be lying if he said he did not hunger for simple smoked meat.

After a few minutes of waiting, Dimitri took hold of the pot before scurrying to place the pot on the table. He rummaged through his stack of pots and pans by the wall before finding a wooden bowl and setting it on the table by Felix’s bedside.

With a ladle Dimitri halved the bowl of soup, leaving Felix with an ample amount. Felix gave the soup a glance, studying it as he stirred to cool it off.

It didn’t look anything out of the ordinary. In fact, it looked and smelled better than Felix expected. Judging from how quickly Dimitri drank his share, it must have tasted just as it looked. Maybe Felix could get used to this.

He lowered his spoon into the soup before blowing over it to cool it down. He ate one spoonful before letting out a series of coughs. The bitterness was overwhelming, not to mention the slimy texture of the soup itself.

What had Dimitri placed in this _concoction_?

“Felix, are you alright?” Dimitri placed a hand at his back, rubbing it as Felix coughed out the taste of the soup.

“What is this?” Felix sent Dimitri an exasperated look. “Is this even supposed to be edible?”

“I apologize.” Dimitri spoke sheepishly. “Please tell me what you disliked about it and I’ll adjust accordingly.”

“I don’t even know what to say about it.” Felix was appalled. He had his own experience of weird tasting food courtesy of Mercedes’s old attempts back at the academy. But this was incomprehensible. He could hardly describe it. “Please don’t tell me you’ve been eating like this this whole time.”

“It hardly matters.” Dimitri shrugged.

“What do you mean ‘it hardly matters’?” Felix wondered if Dimitri’s taste buds were also affected by the curse. He could not fathom eating like this everyday. “I don’t know how you can stomach such a thing. Much less let yourself taste something so nauseating.”

“It tastes like nothing.” Dimitri said nonchalantly as he collected Felix’s bowl, inspecting it as he placed on the dining table.

“Impossible.” Felix scoffed. Dimitri turned around to give him a wry smile.

“I’ve…lost my sense of taste long ago, even before the academy.” Dimitri said quietly, rubbing the back of his neck.

This was new information, the words not quite sinking in.

“What?” Felix tried to recall any accident that may have affected Dimitri in such a manner as to lose his sense of taste. He remembered nothing save for the tragedy. But even that event was a stretch. “How? And since when?”

“Ever since the tragedy.” Felix was not too far off in his guess. “I don’t know the cause of it, and neither did any of the healers.”

“So you’re telling me you just threw stuff together as long as they’re edible?” Felix was in disbelief. At least during the academy, Dimitri had a healthy, edible helping of food prepared for him. But alone for a year, Felix could not help but wonder how Dimitri remained as fit as he was given how he was eating.

“Well, to put it simply, yes.” Dimitri said sheepishly. “It’s not that big of a deal really. Dedue had taught me which ingredients went well together and how long it would take for them to cook.”

Felix was having none of this.

Regardless if Dimitri could taste what he cooks, the fact was that he was eating just as a means to survive. And since he will be staying here for a month or so, he cannot go on eating whatever abomination Dimitri cooked up. It could not be healthy for either of them.

“Help me up.” Felix ordered as he held out his arm for Dimitri to take. “I’ll cook.”

“Felix, there’s no need to exert yourself.” Dimitri reasoned. Felix sent him a glare in return. “Just tell me what you would like and I’ll just follow your instructions.”

“No.” This was clearly not a task he can just delegate to Dimitri. It would also be the least he can do considering he had ended up at his place unannounced. “I’ll handle this. Just help me up already.”

Dimitri let out a tired sigh before wrapping one arm behind Felix’s back, letting Felix throw an arm over his shoulder as he helped him get to his feet. Dimitri had to crouch slightly to accommodate him. Obviously, since only one of them had ever been relegated to kitchen duty, this was the only way to make sure they would eat well.

Dimitri’s hand rested comfortably at his ribcage, supporting him as he stood to his full height. Felix felt slightly unsteady, his body naturally leaning against Dimitri as he took one step. Dimitri’s chest pressed gently against his side, warmth pooling where their bodies met.

Dimitri was so unbelievably warm.

Felix ignored the heat that rose to his cheeks.

They slowly made their way to the fireplace, each step together a chore. The day had only just begun but even a simple task such as cooking breakfast proved to be painstaking. Felix should have expected this. With Dimitri, things were never easy.

“Clumsy as ever.” Felix chided as Dimitri stubbed his foot against the dining table. “Stop anticipating my steps. Just follow me.”

“My apologies.” Felix could tell that Dimitri was becoming fatigued with their position. His neck was probably cramping from leaning down.

Once they arrived at the fireplace, Felix let go of Dimitri’s shoulders. He leaned against the wall to steady himself.

“You have other vegetables?” Felix asked as he fed more wood into the fire.

“Yes, what do you want specifically?” Dimitri turned to rummage through the baskets resting by the fireplace.

“Onions, carrots, tomatoes and potatoes.” Felix listed, scrunching his nose. How he missed meat. “Cabbage too, if you still have some.”

“Anything else?” Dimitri placed the ingredients on the table, his knife already out to peel them.

“Just those for now.” Felix moved to sit beside Dimitri, hands reaching to peel the onions. Even just by peeling the onion, his eyes were already getting teary. “Do you have a spare knife at least?”

“No.” Dimitri frowned.

“Hand me my dagger then. It’s in my pack.” His stomach gave a low growl. Hopefully, they wouldn’t have to wait for long to eat a decent breakfast.

Soon, they lapsed into a comfortable silence as they chopped the ingredients. After placing the ingredients little by little into the pot, they let it simmer with Felix checking the taste of the soup every now and then, and asking Dimitri for some spices to adjust the taste accordingly.

After a short wait, Felix took the pot and placed it on the dining table, removing the lid and releasing its savory scent to the air.

“It smells good.” Dimitri commented. Of course it smelled good. It was edible after all.

Once Dimitri served the soup in their respective bowls, Felix took a long awaited mouthful of his cooking.

‘Better.’ It was as savory as a simple vegetable soup can get, and that was honestly just what Felix needed. Felix finished his share quickly. Then he immediately gave himself another helping.

“I’ll keep in mind your recipe for this, Felix.” Dimitri still hasn’t touched his share. It was as if he was relishing in the soup’s pleasant scent.

“What are you waiting for? Eat.” Felix said. He was certain that the helping that Dimitri had taken earlier was not enough. The ingredients he had used were few and were certainly not enough to fill his stomach. Even though Dimitri could not taste, he should at least eat as much as he should.

Dimitri took his time to study the soup before venturing a taste.

“It does not feel odd. It is a bit hot though.” Dimitri murmured as he took another spoonful. “It’s better than what I have made so far.’

“Good.” Felix was happy that it came out decent.

They continued to eat in silence, far too distracted by their hunger to even attempt any deeper form of conversation.

Felix recalled that it was very much the same as when they were in the monastery, save for the absence of the professor. Felix still disliked how the professor always seemed to invite them together for a meal without fail.

The professor certainly had an agenda.

But even if Felix knew that the professor had wanted them to repair whatever remained of their relationship, Felix could not find it in himself to decline the invitation if only to learn more about his professor’s swordplay.

And only his professor’s swordplay.

The boar was just an observer.

Not like he contributed anything interesting to the conversation anyway.

But for some reason, something was different now. He was certain that Dimitri could feel it too. A lot of things between them hung in the air as they tried to make casual conversation, grasping at whatever mundane, decent thing they could speak of comfortably. Neither of them knew how to broach certain topics, wary of repeating the bitter spat they had endured yesterday. But the urge was there, ever insistent. They could only clam up instead of letting things fall out.

Long ago, Felix would not have cared. He would have lashed out and demanded answers. But the boar— _Dimitri_ was alive, and it did not feel right to unpack whatever vitriol he had cultivated over the years. Not when said vitriol had long since dissipated, only leaving a sad pang in his chest.

Once they have filled their bellies, Dimitri helped Felix back into the bed, cleaning up their bowls and setting them aside to clean later. Dimitri stepped outside of the shack for a minute, returning with a basin of water resting at his hip.

“Let’s change those bandages now, shall we?” Dimitri quietly placed the basin at the side of the bed. He took one towel from his chest of clothes, submerging the cloth into the water. “If you could remove your clothes, it would be very helpful. Though if it’s too much, I’ll lend you a hand.”

“Right.” Dimitri turned his face away as he stripped off his— _Dimitri’s_ tunic to give him a semblance of privacy. A small blush painted the apples of his cheeks as he pointedly looked away from him. Felix almost wanted to scoff. Dimitri had seen him bare numerous times. It was a consequence of being raised together since their childhood. This should not be anything different.

After all, there was nothing of note to be hidden.

“Please turn around for me, Felix.” Felix almost rolled his eyes at his words. There was no need to be so unerringly polite. He was just helping him change his bandages, nothing more. So Felix complied, turning around to face the wall.

Careful fingers brushed over his bandages, the sensation so feather light that it was barely there. He tensed at the action, his breath caught in his throat as he waited for Dimitri to move.

He heard the scratching of the chair against the floor before he heard the sound of water splashing in the basin. Then he felt a finger hook at the length of one of the bandages, the one wrapped around his shoulder.

Felix flinched, the gentle tug making the cloth brush over his tender wounds.

“Sorry.” Dimitri whispered as he removed the bandages more carefully.

“Just get on with it.” Felix gritted his teeth.

His shoulder definitely took the most damage during that night. In turn, his injuries around that area were taking their sweet time to stitch themselves closed, the pain a dull ache whenever he moved.

He had sorely underestimated the beast.

He should have heeded Ashe’s warnings more seriously.

Once Dimitri had removed the bandages completely, he dipped the towel into the basin, wringing water from the towel before wiping it over Felix’s shoulder. Even without looking, Felix knew that he was sporting an apology on his face.

“I know what you’re going to say.” Felix spoke lowly. How many times must he remind him? “I don’t blame you for it. I should have taken Ashe’s advice to bring company.”

“Still, had I had more control over myself then neither you nor anyone else would have suffered such injuries.” Dimitri wiped over his wounds with a gentleness unlike the brutish way he would handle his weapons.

“What’s done is done.” Felix said simply. There was no use in dwelling on the past. “Let’s leave it at that.”

Dimitri remained quiet, focusing instead on cleaning Felix’s wounds. After drying his shoulder, Dimitri went on to unravel the bandages wrapping around his stomach. Felix helped remove the bindings, watching as it revealed sore pink skin, still in the midst of repairing itself.

Looking at the state of his body now, Felix could not believe that he had survived. If this had happened during the war, he would have perished on the battlefield.

The beast was a force to be reckoned with.

But now that same beast was caring for him now, gentle and placid, a far cry from the violent and destructive force he had faced the other night.

Felix did not know how much control Dimitri had over the beast. And neither did he know if the beast was _really_ Dimitri, and whether Dimitri himself was lucid enough to seize control.

With how things are now, it seemed that Dimitri wished atone for his sins. But how much he remembered was left unsaid, with Felix searching for the right words to ask the questions that needed to be put to rest.

Once Dimitri finished wrapping up his torso, Felix slipped on his shirt, flinching as he raised his arms to push through the sleeves. Dimitri waited for him to finish before speaking up.

“Felix, I need you to remove your trousers.” Dimitri stuttered. The moment the words left his lips, pink stained their cheeks. The unintended implication was there. “I mean, your wounds travel far up your leg. It would be more convenient, so to speak.”

“Stop making this awkward than it already is.” Felix muttered lowly as he slipped out of his trousers. It was a bit tedious seeing as he had to turn around and sit at the edge of the bed to completely remove them. Seeing him struggle the slightest bit, Dimitri reached out and helped him pull his legs out of his trousers, his calloused hands brushing over his legs unintentionally.

The blush on his cheeks deepened when he felt it. Trying to ignore the awkwardness of it all, he focused his gaze on the wall. He did not need to watch Dimitri care for his legs with utmost attention. Dimitri was well equipped to handle those injuries himself. He did not need Felix to bark orders and criticisms for every little move.

“Just get it over with, boar.” Felix huffed. The sooner this is over, the sooner he can focus his attention on something else other than Dimitri’s touch.

Dimitri placed Felix’s feet into the basin as he removed the bandages around his legs. There was one nasty gash on his shin, the skin there an angry red, blood just on the verge of forming a scab. When Dimitri ran the wet cloth over it, Felix hissed from how it stung. Dimitri immediately froze from Felix’s reaction.

“Be careful!” Felix muttered. That wound was too sensitive, even the softest brush of cloth induced pain.

“I’m sorry.” Dimitri poured water over the wound to clean it, more careful in his movements.

When Dimitri finally finished cleaning the wounds on his legs, Dimitri dried his legs before wrapping them once again with new bandages.

Felix saw that the water in the basin had turned slightly brown, his blood tainting the once clear water. He scrunched his nose at the sight, mindful of how serious his injuries were. The last time he had seen such a sight was during the war, when he and his classmates had to cut down the Immaculate one. Hopefully, he would not need longer than a month to recuperate.

After all, there were things he had to do and people he needed to talk to.

He watched as Dimitri excused himself, telling him that he will just wash the bandages in the nearby river. He watched his back as he left the shack, leaving him on his own for the time being.

Felix took this time to study Dimitri’s shack. It was quaint, not quite the kind of home which Felix would imagine for such a beast. It was lived in and homey but even now he knew it was lonesome.

Despite Felix’s aversion to socializing, he could not imagine living in seclusion for a year. He was amazed that Dimitri managed to endure it at all, given how he has always gravitated to connecting to others more than Felix ever did. While it was an amazing feat, such came at a price.

Felix was certain that Dimitri lived in fear.

Fear of hurting others, and fear of himself.

It was a pitiful life to lead for a man who arguably had it all. Now, that same man had lost everything, even himself. And Felix could only look at himself and think how lucky he was that the professor had brought him under their wing. He was certain that had things played out differently, he wouldn’t even be sitting on Dimitri’s bed right now. He would have perished long ago.

That was what happened to Dimitri.

No one saved him.

Not when things mattered most.

And not even before.

Now, things needed to change.

And Felix was determined to make it so.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the slight delay! I hoped to finish this chapter a week ago but life has been busy so here we are. I hope this chapter was worth the wait!


	4. A Respite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which they begin to find their place in each other's presence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long. I've been busy adjusting to law school life again and I hope this chap (though light and shorter than usual) makes up for it!
> 
> Chapter warnings: brief mention of suicidal attempts but very vague and it's just one sentence.

There was blood on his hands, staining his calloused palms a sickening brown.

As he rubbed out whatever was left of the stains on the bandages, Dimitri’s thoughts quickly ventured to the incident: the night he had almost killed Felix.

He was brutal, pure violence incarnated, a monster made to enjoy the destruction he so favored.

Guilt set deeply into his chest each time he glanced at Felix. He could still hardly believe he had survived. Had it been anyone else: less unskilled, less experienced, a mere common man, they would have been left to bleed to their demise. Still, Dimitri felt Felix’s pain as if it were his own, his every flinch and grunt a reminder to his body. Each hitched breath, prompting his own to ache just from the guilt of it all.

Dimitri could tell that Felix had noticed. Felix must be peeved that he was being looked on with pity. But Dimitri could not help it. Not when Felix’s injured body proved to him that he was indeed what he feared.

A _beast_.

Even earlier this morning he felt its talons clawing at him, tempting him to break composure and surrender his control. As he gazed at Felix’s bare body, Dimitri felt his teeth, _blunt_ _fangs,_ tingle, as if thirsting for a taste of the beautiful bare flesh in front of him.

It took everything in him to hold back from biting into Felix’s skin. Oh how he wanted to mark the pale expanse of his skin. Surely, his marks would go nicely with his scars, accentuating the paleness of his skin, the bruises he’d suck onto him becoming embellishments to his already apparent beauty _._ His nape, in particular, would be the best place to make his mark, to let his teeth bite into the sensitive skin, marking him as _his._

No.

_No._

Dimitri shook the thought out of his head as he focused on cleaning the bandages. He should not be thinking of Felix in such a manner. He was a beast, he had absolutely _no right._ Besides, it was not as if Felix had fully forgiven him. He doubted that even with Felix’s disposition, that he still held a sort of wariness around him, maybe even resentment. He had been the cause for his abrupt leave from his mercenary work after all. And before this, they had not properly spoken for years.

The Felix before him was a stranger, familiar but foreign all at once.

Instead of forcing his whims on him, Dimitri deemed it better to begin again with him. There was no other way around it seemed, especially with Felix’s declaration that he wanted him to _live_. His words still shook him to his core, still in disbelief. That the very person who had left him in the first place, who scorned him for what he truly was, wanted him to _live._

A part of him still resented Felix’s choice but he could not find it in himself to blame Felix for forging a better path for himself, a path which did not include him.

He was glad to hear that Felix had been doing well all these years despite the war. A stark contrast to the ongoing disaster he has become. Felix seemed to be put together, better than he ever was when they were still close friends.

Dimitri could not exactly describe what he felt. Was it jealousy? Anger? Regret? Longing?

With Felix’s arrival, Dimitri had found it increasingly difficult to assess his emotions with clarity.

There was so much to _feel_ with Felix around, and so much to think about.

After Felix’s recovery, what would become of them? Surely, Felix would return to his trade, and Dimitri would return to his solitary lifestyle. That was what would come about at the end, wasn’t it? It was a pervasive thought in his mind.

Felix was only to stay here for a month but it was clear that even if his priority was his recovery that he had something else on mind, and Dimitri could not determine what. He could hazard a guess that such involved him but Dimitri could not think further than that. Nevertheless, he has time to figure it out. A whole month in fact. Surely, that would be enough time to figure things out, considering Felix has become quite lenient on him, less harsh and more _gentle_.

The way Felix touched him, held him even, was partly disconcerting.

The Felix he knew always made it a point to push him away at every opportunity. But this Felix drew him closer, actually allowing himself to request for Dimitri’s aid.

His touch was warm. It felt like a gentle brand on his skin, comforting, and almost familiar. Dimitri felt himself melt under his touch. He craved it like a man parched.

The beast inside him craved it too _with utter ferocity._

The sound of cloth tearing apart broke Dimitri out of his trance.

In his hands were Felix’s bandages, cleaned but torn. With a sigh, Dimitri brought to torn cloth to his forehead, contemplating whether he made the right decision to let Felix stay. The beast— _him—_ was a challenge to keep under wraps. It was determined not to submit to his control nor was it compliant in what Dimitri wanted to do.

Dimitri feared what he may do to Felix.

The Felix whom he was in the process of reconciling with.

The Felix with whom he wanted to rebuild their relationship with.

_His Felix._

Dimitri could not stand the thought of it: Felix’s blood on his hands, his face etched with utter terror, and his lifeless body cradled in his arms. Still, stubbornly, Felix would want to remain at his side.

Dimitri could only endeavor to do his best to rein the beast within him.

* * *

Dimitri returned to the cottage with a basin at his hip and clean bandages on hand. With a careful push, Dimitri opened the door to his humble home, finding Felix sitting atop the bed, a familiar book in hand. Felix only gave him a small glance before returning his attention to the book.

Judging from the book’s cover, it was one of those old knights tales he and Felix used to read when they were children. Felix probably had no other choice, considering the limited selection his bookshelf had. It was nice to see that Felix at least tolerated reading such stories again.

During their academy days, he would brush Ashe’s every attempt at recommending him a book. Neither did he entertain Ingrid’s excitement whenever the said tales came up in conversation. Now, he was reading the book as if it was just a simple story, not something he had considered so vile and abhorrent in the past.

“I’m back.” Dimitri said, placing the basin back in its place and the bandages into the chest.

“I know.” Felix said silently, his eyes still poring over the book.

An awkward silence stretched between them, enough to make Dimitri fidget in his place as he rummaged through his thoughts for something to say.

“If I’m not mistaken, that is ‘Loog and the Maiden of Wind’, right?” Dimitri started, beginning with something easy to talk about. “We’ve both read it before, haven’t we?”

“Who hasn’t?” Felix raised a brow at him. “Every child in Faerghus knows this story by heart.”

“Ah, that’s correct.” Dimitri rubbed the back of his neck. “Though, I recall that we had first read it together, back in the castle’s library...”

“Hmph, and we got scolded right after for hiding in the corner of the library and reading that book until late at night.” Dimitri could have sworn that Felix’s lips tugged the slightest bit upward.

“Yet we did the same thing again with whatever books we found in the library. Once he was fed up, Gustave had yanked us out right out of the room and back to training.” Dimitri had a fond smile on his face as he reminisced. Yes, he and Felix had tried to get away with so many things in their childhood.

“It was you who insisted we read more.” Felix quipped, a small smirk tugged at his lips.

“Of course, but you had gone along with it anyway.” Dimitri smiled, sending Felix a teasing look. Felix quickly shifted his attention elsewhere, the tips of his ears red with embarrassment.

“Whatever. That’s all in the past.” Felix said, closing the book. Suddenly, a question danced on the tip of Dimitri’s tongue.

“Do you still hate them?” Felix gave him a confused look. “These tales of chivalry, I mean.”

Felix pondered over his question, a pensive look was painted on his face as he gave pause.

“I still hate it. But I understand its significance. Doesn’t mean I agree with it. Death isn’t something— it’s not an ideal— to be glorified. What use is a dead man who could no longer protect his countrymen.” Dimitri saw the way Felix’s hands clench the blanket tightly as he spoke. “Everyone should know better. _You_ should know better than to sacrifice yourself for some useless reason too.”

Felix’s eyes levelled him with an almost scolding look. The implication of his words shot straight through Dimitri’s chest. He has yet to decide what was the best solution to this precarious predicament they were in. He agreed with Felix, and wanted to take his words to heart. But the threat of the beast still lingered, what other option was there to solve this situation? Dimitri could not think of none other than living solitarily.

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Dimitri replied, something akin to confusion swirled in his chest. “Anyways, could you tell me more of what had happened after I had perished? I imagine you had participated in bringing peace back to Fódlan considering you followed the professor.”

“Hmph, there’s not much to say about it.” Felix frowned. “We went against the Empire, it went about what you can expect.”

“I see.” But Felix’s answer did not quell the question that lingered in Dimitri’s mind. “How was it? I assume it must have been an endeavor especially considering you were up against—”

“Are you seriously asking me what it was like to kill Edelgard?” Felix raised an unimpressed brow at him.

Dimitri felt his heart stop in his chest when Felix went straight to the heart of his thoughts about the war. Equally embarrassed and even more curious Dimitri continued: “No, no! I just...I was curious is all. You had been in the same class as her I assumed—“

“Her methods were far too severe for my liking or for the rest of the class for that matter. We had no choice but to put a stop to it.” Felix interjected. Dimitri felt Felix’s anger flash in just one moment before it disappeared. “And the Professor lead the way. In fact, it was the Professor who had gone against her if that was what you were wondering.”

“I see.” Dimitri felt his hands clench into fists. Edelgard had met her end with the professor. And yet, it felt as if he still had to unleash his vengeance on her in some manner. Everything she had done, everything that had gone between them, lingered at the back of Dimitri’s mind. Its whispers echoing in passing along with the voices who had often reminded him of his failures.

_‘How disappointing.’_

_‘Some prince of Faerghus you are.’_

_‘It was worthless that you had survived.’_

Dimitri had no choice but to _let go._ But such an endeavor was a long arduous process, as was settling the ghosts who still whispered in his mind. He hardly knew how to handle it. All he knew was that he _should_ be fighting it and not submit himself to their whims.

“I was on the battlefield with Sylvain and Ashe while they went to confront her. And the rest is history,” Felix said nonchalantly, breaking Dimitri’s out of his thoughts. “We took down those who conspired with her as well. The ones who turned you into whatever you are right now.”

“So...I am all that is left of them, aren’t I?” Dimitri’s voice was barely above a whisper.

“You could say that,” Felix said simply. “There’s no other way to put it anyway.”

He’s the last breathing evidence of their existence, a notion which twisted Dimitri’s gut. If he was to assume such things, he would be what could be considered a last ditch effort at twisting Fódlan into chaos.

The plan would have been to create him: a beast, nigh killable and completely indestructible. A monster born to leave destruction in its wake.

Dimitri had tried numerous times to rid the world of himself. Blatantly aware of his inability to control is _urges,_ his _rage._ But each time, he failed and the beast would take over and wreak havoc, desolating almost every living being in sight.

Dimitri was at a loss.

Dimitri doubted that anyone could deal with him.

Dimitri doubted that Felix would survive being with him for long.

He knew the beast was merely biding its time to finally rip apart its prey— _his prey._

A man he felt betrayed by, and yet also a man he yearned for all this time.

Things were not looking good _at all._

“I know what you’re thinking, Bo— _Dimitri_ , and don’t you _dare_ try and send me away again,” Felix had a scathing look on his face. “I’m here to recover per the healer’s orders. If I want to get back on my feet, I have to stay whether you like it or not.”

Dimitri heaved sigh, defeated. All he can really do was do his best to rein the beast within him and protect Felix from himself.

“You really leave me no choice, Felix.” Dimitri smiled wryly.

“Because you haven’t made a good choice ever since—“ Felix cut himself off before he could continue, well aware of the sharpness of the words on the verge of falling from his lips. “Fuck this. I’m _staying._ End of discussion. Don’t bring this up again. I’m sick and tired of—” Dimitri once again saw Felix bite his lip, stopping himself from continuing. “Just—you know what I mean!”

“Alright, Felix. I promise.” Dimitri felt the urge to let out a small chuckle at how much Felix held himself back. Still, he wished that Felix would become less guarded in time. He could not deny that there were things he had wanted to hear from Felix himself. But such things will come in due time.

So Dimitri will wait patiently, until the time comes and as long as time and the beast permits.

Once Felix returned back to reading the book, Dimitri turned to rummage around the chest for a new set of clothes, folding them neatly above the chest before reaching for a training lance at the weapons rack.

“Where are you off to?” Felix asked nonchalantly, still engrossed in the book.

“Training.” Dimitri tested the weight of the lance in his hand. Training was one of the only things that entertained him in his solitude. It also served him well whenever he hunted for food.

“Let me watch you then.” Felix closed the book, and moved his legs over the side of his bed.

“I thought the healer had told you to rest?” Dimitri asked, resisting the urge to cross his arms. Felix had already helped him cook earlier, pushing his still healing body more than he should. Felix should not be so eager to get out of bed if he wanted to be able to handle his sword once again.

“I am, and it’s not like I’ll be joining you. I’ll just observe.” Felix rolled his eyes. “The healer also said some time under the sun will do me good.”

“As you wish then.” Dimitri held out his hand for Felix to take. Felix paused for a moment, staring at his hand before taking it and pulling himself up to stand. He was still unsteady on his feet so Dimitri wrapped his arm around his waist as he led him outside to the garden, helping him settle down on the ground before returning to the shack to retrieve his lance.

Dimitri felt nervousness prickle at his neck. It has been so long since he had company while he was training, and that certain company was Felix no less. He felt the slightest bit anxious, unused to the attention Felix has been graciously giving him so.

With a deep breath, Dimitri started off with the usual forms, stretching his muscles as he went about the start of his training.

Felix remained quiet for the first parts of his usual training, his sharp eyes observing his every move. Dimitri could tell that Felix had several things to say about his training regime.

“Your form is off,” Felix said bluntly.

“How off?” Dimitri asked. Honestly, as he trained, his body moved on its own. Routine had made his body memorize every movement, every slash and thrust. However, without someone to countercheck him, he must have built up some bad habits along the way.

“You’re putting too much weight on your left.” Felix supplied, gesturing to his left leg.

“I see.” Dimitri then adjusted himself, and tried once again. This time the thrust felt more fluid, just like it did when he was in his prime. Maybe letting Felix watch him was not so bad of an idea. Truthfully, he did miss having a sparring partner. And back at the academy, his best spars was with Felix. Suddenly, an idea popped in his mind, the idea slipping out before Dimitri could even think.

“Maybe once you’ve recovered, we could spar?”

“I’ll think about it.” Dimitri swore he saw a silver of a smile on Felix’s face.

* * *

The rest of the day had been uneventful but it still left them fatigued, eager to rest and get to bed.

“Good night,” Felix said, as he turned to lay on his side, closing his eyes.

“To you as well, Felix.” Dimitri replied as he got into a more comfortable position on the floor.

Once both of them had settled down and closed their eyes, Dimitri oddly felt himself quickly drifting to sleep.

There was complete utter darkness.

Dimitri could not see himself nor anything around him. He felt a strong pull yet he could not feel any touch pulling on him. It was disconcerting. It felt like the darkness itself was swallowing him whole, pulling him deeper and deeper into it without reprieve.

The sound of something cracking suddenly echoed in the darkness, prompting him to turn around. Only to find himself face to face with _himself._

“You’re a shameless liar, you know that right?” His other self said to him, coming closer.

“I know.” Dimitri conceded. “But—“

“You should be _punished._ " His other self quickly grasped his neck, cutting off his breath, raising him above the ground. "Take responsibility for what you have done, for the lives you’ve taken, for the pleasure you derived from such horrid actions.”

Dimitri thrashed, desperate to remove the chokehold the beast had on him. He tried to pry his claws off his neck, gasping for air as he used whatever strength he had left.

“Stop lying. You enjoyed every _second_ of it. Every flesh torn apart, and every bone broken. You revelled in it.” The beast tightened his grip. “Liars should be punished.”

The beast was relentless, grinning as he held Dimitri’s neck. Seeing his own face sporting such a vile smile made him want to vomit.

“Let yourself enjoy it. Don’t be afraid. _Embrace_ it.” The beast beckoned him.

“No!” Dimitri continued to struggle. He felt ashamed, regretful, _guilty._ But most of all, he felt that he wanted to be free. But he can’t, he just _can’t._ The beast was stronger than he, smarter than he, even _wiser_ than he. Dimitri could only succumb to the darkness leaking from his grip.

Suddenly, from the very vestiges of his sleep, he felt a warm hand settle over his forehead with unfamiliar gentleness. Its warmth aided him in his battle in his sleep, reminding him that he had strength yet to overcome them.

Yet the flames and blood continued to persist in his dreams, haunting and ever persistent in reminding him of his failures, his mistakes and the very beast he has become.

Along with the smile of a wicked, monstrous man, eager to drown him in darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments are very much appreciated!


	5. Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A letter was sent, and a night went awry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What? An update so soon? Happy Halloween! Really sorry for the sporadic updates. But I really enjoyed writing this chap and I hope you guys enjoy reading it too!
> 
> Also upping the rating in prep for some...things. Anyway, hope you enjoy this!
> 
> Chapter warnings: Violence

They have built some sort of routine.

Two weeks later, and they have found their footing around each other almost seamlessly, only stumbling every now and then. They were now familiar with how the other worked, passing by each other with hardly a bump, almost subconsciously making way for each other as they went about their days.

Their days usually went on like this: Dimitri would wake, rather he had already been awake even before the crack of dawn, and hunt for food before Felix wakes from his slumber. Once he had caught his game, he brought it back to the shack, skinning it to reveal the meat that Felix had been craving. After that, Dimitri would venture into the shack, quiet in his footsteps, only to be greeted with a Felix who had already woken up, stretching his muscles like a cat.

“What took you so long?” Felix would ask, before throwing his legs to the side, already gesturing Dimitri to help him up. Then they would cook, changing recipes every now and then to suit Felix’s taste. After breakfast, they would then settle on Dimitri’s bed, changing Felix’s bandages and applying the salve generously on his wounds. Thankfully, the healer drops by every week to give them a new salve.

After that, Felix would watch Dimitri train, criticizing his almost every move as if he was the Professor himself. Dimitri had learned that he had much to polish on, considering his usual opponents only included animals in the nearby forest, and a stray bandit wandering near the shack. Felix helped him realized that.

Then after gathering fruits and vegetables from the garden, they returned back to the shack for a good night’s rest.

Two weeks later, and Felix could finally get up on his own without his help. Though he walked with a slight limp, favoring his right leg as he took his every step. Dimitri would still help him regain his footing every now and then. But Felix was stubborn, refusing his help at times, and proving to him again and again that he can handle it just fine.

Dimitri did not mean to be overbearing. He was pretty sure Felix could feel it though. And Felix, for all the years he spent with him, despised being coddled. But recently, it seemed that he was less averse to the aid Dimitri had been giving him, almost as if he was no longer burned by Dimitri’s touch.

It was progress. And it made Dimitri smile.

Dimitri had just returned from his latest hunt, a boar slung over his shoulder as he pushed the doors to the shack open. Felix was in bed as usual but in his hands were no longer a book, but a quill and paper, the tip of the quill scratching audibly against the parchment. Felix was so engrossed in writing that he hadn't noticed Dimitri’s arrival.

After setting the boar on the table, Dimitri strode to Felix’s side slowly, eye twinkling with curiosity.

“I’m back,” Dimitri said as he sat on the chair beside the bed.

“I want you to send this letter for me,” Felix said simply. “It’s been two weeks. I promised Ashe I’d let him know I’m fine.”

At the mention of Ashe’s name, Dimitri flinched; still all too familiar with the damage he caused him.

Maybe Felix could write to him his apology. However, that would risk making his survival known. He cannot bear it, seeing everyone again after everything he had done: leading them to useless battles and even gravely injuring them almost to the point of disability. He lacked the courage to face them. His loss, though grave, was enough of a consolation for them. They no longer had to contend with him, a broken man and a beast all in one.

 _This_ was enough.

“It would not take too long for you to just send it, right?” Felix asked, his eyes studying his disposition. Felix was well aware of Dimitri’s aversion to visiting villages. Felix being considerate of him…it felt nice. And it made him feel all the more ready to do the task.

“Of course, Chalphy is only an hour away, after all.” Dimitri traced the route in his head. It should not be too arduous a task. “I won’t be gone for long, and will return back as soon as I’m done.”

“Alright then,” Felix said as he sealed the letter with wax. “Have a safe journey.”

Before Felix handed over the letter, he gave him an odd look, an expression that Dimitri could not decipher. With a nod, Felix finally placed the letter in Dimitri’s hand.

Dimitri left the cottage confused.

Once Dimitri arrived at the village, he was overwhelmed with the amount of people milling about the town square. Dimitri greatly disliked crowds. The deluge of people provoked the beast within him, tempting him to crush everything in sight.

But no, he had control over this. When he had fetched the healer, he contained it so well that it was a mere muted whisper in his ears.

He can do this.

This village was larger than most, being at the center of Blaiddyd and Fraldarius territory. It was a meeting point for trade. Various people come and go as they please after they’ve satisfied themselves with whatever business they had in the village. So the crowd itself was of no surprise to him.

He had clad himself in a tattered cloak so as to not draw attention. His sheer stature was already enough to turn heads but surely his face would only make things direr, more difficult to deal with.

Once he was near the messenger’s post, he held onto the letter tightly under his cloak. After the look Felix had given him, Dimitri could not help but feel the urge to read the letter himself, his curiosity increasing each step he took closer to the post.

Felix had not given him any idea as to what else he had written, save for telling Ashe that he was well. But when he managed to catch a glance of the letter’s contents, it was lengthier than what would be a Felix written report.

Usually, Felix would just write a few sentences and be done with it but with this letter, he had managed several sentences, lengthier than what you could expect from Felix who had always been straight to the point.

And so curiosity won, and Dimitri moved to an alley beside the post, his hands shaking as he gazed upon the letter in his hands.

With a deep breath, Dimitri undid the seal, careful as to not fully destroy it, and opened the letter to read it in its entirety.

_Ashe,_

_It’s been two weeks and as I promised you, I’m writing this to tell you I’m fine._

_The beast was just as you said. I should have taken your advice but of course I managed to deal with it. I managed to get by with some injuries but I will be back in a few weeks time._

_But there was more to the beast than what you have told me._

_Ashe, it’s Dimitri._

_Dimitri is alive, and is walking around as that goddess forsaken beast._

_We have no choice but to do something about this, and as you have told me before, we should fight this together._

_We could not just leave him be._

_You and I know both know that perfectly._

_We have to contact the others: Sylvain, Ingrid, Dedue, Mercedes and Annette._

_As soon as you receive this letter, send for the rest. I will be waiting here where you had first found the beast— Dimitri— and I will handle him on my own for the meantime._

_We have no time to waste._

_Felix_

Dimitri had hoped that Felix would just tell him the beast had been slain. But after reading the letter, Dimitri had the faint urge to rip it apart.

He could almost imagine it, once they all convene at the shack, the beast would claw its way out knowing the imminent threat against him. And Dimitri, weak and almost powerless Dimitri, would have no choice but to watch his comrades get slaughtered one by one, falling to the ground as they breathed their last.

It was highly likely that _he_ would surely kill every last one of them.

Writing this letter was reckless, especially for a person as cautious as Felix. Dimitri wanted to burn the letter, crush it into pieces because the very idea of killing his friends was not something he could bear with the rest of his life.

But Felix’s words echoed in his mind _: “I want you to live. Simple as that.”_ And Dimitri found himself stopping at the last second from tearing the letter apart. What exactly had Felix meant when he said that?

He was already alive. He had a roof to shelter him from storms and snow. He had a garden from which he could grow vegetables and fruits. He could hunt in the nearby forest for decent meat. He could go to the village whenever necessary.

Wasn’t that enough proof that he was _living_?

No.

Now, that could not be what Felix meant.

Felix words once again echoed in his mind: “ _And so you decided that isolating yourself from the world was the best course of action? Don’t make me laugh. This is the bare minimum of a solution.”_

Dimitri must concede.

Felix was right.

He was not _living_ per se, but only surviving.

But the thought of a life beyond the shelter of his solitude was surreal. He could not imagine it. He has _never_ imagined it. He had long resigned himself to his solitary lifestyle, expecting the world to go on seamlessly without his existence.

But Felix has turned that notion upside down, presenting him with something else, extending his hand to him in a time where he hardly knew what it was like to be with another.

He could not deny that he longed for it. His days had always been lonesome. But once Felix entered into the picture, it felt like he was breathing again, _living_ again.

And that very thought was what stopped him from ripping the letter apart.

Apprehensive as he was, he _wanted_ to give this solution a chance, scary as it may be.

Who knows? Maybe the world would finally be rid of the beast.

So with a deep breath, he mailed the letter with resolution, holding onto Felix’s words like a lifeline.

“You’re back.” Felix was already in the process of preparing their lunch, setting the plates and bowls on the table.

Dimitri unclasped his cloak and hung it on the wall before going before Felix, a sword and a bow hidden behind his back.

“Yes, I am,” Dimitri said. “I also have something to give you, if you don’t mind that is.”

His words piqued Felix’s curiosity; Felix’s brows were raised in surprise as he gazed back at him.

“Well, what is it? It better not be something weird,” Felix asked, returning to arranging their lunch.

Without a moment’s hesitation, Dimitri presented the bow and sword to Felix; Felix’s eyes widened at the sight of them. They were simpler weapons than what they had used for the war, but the way they were crafted betrayed their durability as well as combat capability.

Dimitri had caught their shine from the corner of his eye just as he was to leave the village. Deciding that he truly wanted to make it up to Felix, Dimitri bought the weapons with no hesitation, eager to atone for his mistakes.

Felix took the weapons from Dimitri’s hand carefully, studying them as he tested their weight in his hands.

“You had told me before you wanted to help with the hunt as well. So I decided that maybe a bow would suffice for now so the work won’t strain you,” Dimitri explained as he rubbed the back of his neck.

“These would do just fine,” Felix said as he put away the weapons. The tips of his ears were an adorable red. Dimitri could not help but feel proud that he managed such a reaction from Felix. “And the letter?”

“I sent it,” Dimitri said simply, trying his best to make it appear as if he had not read any of it.

“I see.” Felix had that suspicious glint in his eye as he looked at him. Dimitri knew that Felix saw right through him, Felix’s lips quirking up into a small knowing smile. “I’m glad you sent it.”

“You place too much faith in me, Felix,” Dimitri admitted. Truly, for all the years Felix forsook him, it was surreal that he now _openly_ showed him that he believed him. It warmed Dimitri’s heart to no end.

“Whether you like it or not, there is still hope yet for you,” Felix gestured to Dimitri to sit for lunch. Clearly, unfazed at the fact that Dimitri read his letter. Dimitri had an inkling that Felix fully expected him to read it. But it seemed that Felix was relieved that he sent it anyway.

“Are you certain about this? You already have a life built for yourself.” Dimitri asked, still apprehensive.

Felix turned to him with a resolute face, fiery eyes filled with determination.

“I came here to do away with the beast, and I’m not leaving until I do.”

* * *

Felix was finally allowed to go on a hunt, much to Dimitri’s chagrin. He was well enough that he could reliably hunt down their dinner, no matter how fast it may be. Tonight, Felix was thankful that he had been trained with a bow when he was a child, and that Dimitri had taken into account that aspect of him.

Loathe as he was to admit it, it made his heart flutter that Dimitri had given him the bow.

The forest near the shack was quite dense. Surely, this must be the reason why Dimitri had managed to survive a year on his own with the hundreds of animals living within his vicinity, all prime for hunting.

“We’ve been around this area for an hour now,” Felix whispered. His arrow was still notched at his bow. “We should move to somewhere else.”

“I think we should take some time here just a bit longer,” Dimitri whispered back. “It takes patience after all.”

“Is this why you take off for so long?” Felix resisted the urge to run a hand down his face. Of course, Felix knew the basic mechanics of hunting but Dimitri took longer than usual. His patience was of a magnitude far too great. Felix could only wait with worry as Dimitri took off for hours at a time just to catch some deer.

Felix knew he had no reason to worry. Dimitri was nigh indestructible anyway. Hardly anything could faze him. From what he had learned from him, he would usually transform when there would be a full moon or even worse, when he suffers any form of injury. It was only then that the beast would emerge. And judging by the scratch marks by his bed, Dimitri had learned of that condition at such an unfortunate time.

Dimitri had been on his own for so long. He was used to such things. But Felix felt that small yet familiar longing and worry he had nursed when they were children, when they were at the academy, and when the continent was at war. Felix considered it a habit, a feeling that had ingrained in him over the years since he was at Dimitri’s side.

Felix, if he could hazard a guess, was worried, not for the potential damage that may occur to Dimitri but for the very fact that he always went off on his own as if it was his duty to do so, to shoulder every burden, every struggle on himself.

Every time he would return to the shack after a hunt, he would sport a small, accomplished smile on his face but with a weariness hanging down on his shoulders.

Felix was no stranger to it. He had become familiar with it back at the academy. To know that not much has changed since then _concerned_ him. Especially with how Dimitri felt betrayed, _abandoned,_ when he needed him most.

Now, he hoped, that with everyone gathering once again that they could finally help Dimitri lift himself up to better heights, and allow him to truly _live_ again.

From the corner of his eye, he watched as Dimitri scanned the premises, his keen ears twitching every now and then if he so heard a rustle of grass. They waited around the area for an hour before Dimitri finally conceded and followed Felix’s lead.

They arrived at an area where Dimitri had apparently not fully explored yet. The area was denser, as if protecting its inhabitants from any who would prey on them. Dimitri then took the lead, ever so cautious as he studied their surroundings.

“I have been here before but not for long,” Dimitri said as his tightened his grip on his lance. “Usually, I’ve hunted bigger game here. Such as that boar I had taken back the other day.”

“All the more reason to be cautious then,” Felix said. His bow was still at the ready. “There must be something bigger here, maybe even a bear.”

A low ominous growl suddenly sounded, putting them on high alert. The two scanned the area in the darkness, not finding the source of the sound. With a nod, Felix followed Dimitri’s lead. With Dimitri’s instincts, hopefully they could find what they were looking for and defeat it before it could even think of attacking them.

Soon enough, they find themselves at the foot of a stony hill, slippery and covered with moss. It seemed to be undisturbed, lying dormant almost at the edge of the forest. Dimitri and Felix approached it with caution; mindful making any noise so as to not disturb whatever was lying deeper in the forest.

Another growl sounded, this time closer. Felix felt a gust of wind coming from his side, the scent of it pungent, reeking blood. Dimitri had taken notice of it as well, steadying his lance in front him as he turned to the direction of the wind.

Suddenly, giant paws emerged from the trees, its claws out, ready to swipe at them and end their life. Dimitri hastily pulled Felix to the side; painfully aware of the limp he was still sporting.

This was not the best time to go head to head with two beastly wolves after all.

“Felix stay back! I’ll lure them to me.” Dimitri exclaimed as he parried one of the wolves’ paws. “Shoot at them when you see an opening.”

“I know.” Felix walked briskly to the trees, hiding himself from plain view as he watched Dimitri battle the two wolves, two to one. Dimitri’s stamina was a thing of wonder, considering how it seemed that he has yet to tire defending himself against the two beasts.

Once one of the wolves turned around, shifting its full attention to Dimitri, Felix took advantage of the opportunity and shot an arrow straight to its neck.

It howled in pain, thrashing at Dimitri who effortlessly dodged its blows. With one resolute swing of his lance, Dimitri stabbed right through the heart of the wolf, killing it in one shot.

But the battle was not over yet; the other wolf was far larger than the one Dimitri had just killed. It stood several feet taller than the other. Evidently, it was a formidable foe. But surely, it’s nothing he and Dimitri could not handle.

With his sole attention on the beast, Dimitri stabbed one of its paws with a roar, pinning the beast down in its place to give Felix a clear shot. However, the wolf thrashed in its place, using its other paw to swipe at Dimitri. Dimitri dodged the blows as best he could. He caught the determined paw in his hand, pushing back as the wolf snarled at him. The wolf, even injured, still pushed him back, its might undeterred by the lance pinning it down.

Felix could see the sweat dripping down from Dimitri’s brow as he defended himself. Dimitri shot Felix a dire look, signalling him to take the damn shot.

But it was difficult to get a clear aim at the thrashing wolf but knowing that he had no other choice, Felix positioned himself closer to it, aiming his arrow at its neck.

He released the arrow, sending it straight ahead, piercing through the air.

Unfortunately, the beast moved at the last second, and the arrow went straight to Dimitri’s arm.

Felix’s eyes widened in horror as he moved closer to Dimitri on instinct.

He had to do something.

He couldn’t stand losing Dimitri _again._

He trudged as quickly as he could to his side but Dimitri sent him a warning look, his blue eye darkening as he caught sight of Felix.

“Stay away from me, Felix!” Dimitri warned him. “Don’t come any closer! Just run!”

Suddenly, bubbles of dark magic enveloped Dimitri’s body, covering his whole body in dark violet bursts.

He had miscalculated.

If only he had aimed the arrow better.

 _‘Fuck,’_ Felix thought, scolding himself for not thinking ahead.

Now because of his mistake, he, _alone,_ had to contend with not one but _two_ beasts.

 _‘For fuck’s sake.’_ This was not the best time to be injured.

Soon, the dark magic enveloping Dimitri bubbled into something larger. And once its work was done, it left the beast — _Dimitri_ — in its wake.

With a snarl, the beast removed the arrow from its arm. It returned its attention to larger wolf before it. But Felix didn’t miss the glint in its eye when it caught sight of him.

The larger wolf growled, breaking the lance pinning its paw to the ground before swiping its claws at the beast. Its claws pierced right through the beast’s torso, causing the beast to howl in pain. But the beast was determined; it grabbed the wolf’s paws, gripping it tightly to break its bones.

However, the wolf used its other paw to grip the beast’s shoulder, causing the beast to grit its teeth in pain.

Dimitri had told him to run, but he cannot in good conscience allow him— _the beast_ — to battle the giant wolf alone.

For now, he decided, that he will at least shoot one arrow to weaken it, determined to help ease the burden in any way.

He moved farther from the two before notching an arrow at his bow, this time aiming straight for the wolf’s head. With a deep breath, he released it, the arrow embedding itself right at the wolf’s head, causing it stumble on its feet.

Felix felt his heart race as he watched the beast take the opportunity to tear right through the wolf with ease.

Once the wolf was torn apart, the beast set his eye on him, blue eye darkening as it slowly approached him.

Felix felt a shiver shoot down his spine as he watched the beast come closer and closer.

With no hesitation, Felix took Dimitri’s orders and ran.

Felix ran as fast as he could with his limp. He wasn’t at all making the distance between him and the beast any larger with how fast he was going. He cursed at himself for not being cautious the first time. Now, for the second time he meets the beast, this might truly be his end.

As Felix ran, the beast took its time, savoring the image of its prey running away with fear.

Thinking on his feet, Felix turned around to shoot an arrow at it but the beast merely caught it in its hands before breaking it into two.

This prompted Felix to run faster as much as he could even with his limp slowing him down.

Slowly but surely, he could hear the beast’s heavy breathing. He vaguely heard it licking its teeth as it came ever closer.

Felix had run blindly, and now he found himself cornered at the foot of the hill with no place to go. He could do no more than brace himself.

The beast caged him against the wall its body, grinning at him as it pressed closer and closer until its snout was a mere inch away from Felix’s face.

Felix felt his heart race a mile a minute. He had never been cornered like this. He could not think of what to do to get out of the beast’s periphery, much less to defeat the stalwart thing before him.

Felix grunted with frustration.

He had no options.

He had no blade to defend himself

He had no legs capable of helping him escape.

Now, Felix Hugo Fraldarius was about to meet his end by being cornered by a beast who was once his friend.

The beast suddenly lunged towards him, its snout pressing against Felix’s face.

Without thinking, Felix reached as if to stop the beast’s snout from coming closer, pushing his hand against its forehead.

Once his hand made contact with the beast, the beast suddenly froze.

His touch apparently had an effect to the beast, Felix thought. So maybe, just maybe…

He hoped to the Goddess that this will work.

Felix placed his hand more firmly and more gently over its forehead, letting the warmth of his bare hand bleed to the beast’s forehead.

“Come on, Boar. _Fight it.”_ Felix called out, voice shaking.

The beast snarled at his face but Felix did not waver.

Goddess, he was really risking it all, wasn’t he?

“Come on! You’re a Blaiddyd for crying out loud,” Felix shouted at the beast’s face. “You’re telling me you’re just going to lose to some stupid beast!”

The beast, instead of snarling in retaliation, _howled_ , as if Dimitri himself was reaching out to him.

“Come on, _Dimitri.”_ Felix called out desperately. “Please.”

The beast howled again, this time more lowly.

 _‘You're in there. I know it. Just seize control, god damn it.’_ Felix pressed his hand more firmly.

“ _Dimitri,_ come back to me,” Felix said softly.

All of a sudden, the beast completely froze, its lone blue eye closing before its arms went limp at its sides.

Felix reached out to the beast one more time, calling out his name: “ _Dimitri.”_

The beast finally collapsed on its feet, bright light enveloping its body as fur dissolved to human flesh, as its snout retreated to its body, as the light revealed Dimitri.

Felix heaved a deep breath of relief, endlessly glad that the ordeal was over. The event had been much too close for comfort but at least now he knew he could fell the beast without even hurting his friend—Dimitri.

Felix immediately fell down to his knees in exhaustion, and slowly crawled over Dimitri to check on him.

Dimitri was panting as he lay on the ground with his eye closed.

Felix was beyond relieved. He reached out a hand to place over Dimitri’s forehead, brushing away the strands as he simply held his friend, content with the reality that he was fine.

All of a sudden, Dimitri lurched, bringing Felix close to him, hugging him to his shoulder. The action literally took Felix’s breath away as he leaned his head over Dimitri’s shoulder.

“You managed to save yourself, Felix. There are no words to describe how relieved I am.” Dimitri spoke thickly **.**

“No, _we_ did it. You managed to save yourself too,” Felix said. His eyes were starting to get bleary.

As Dimitri sobbed into Felix’s shoulder, he said softly: “You saved me.”

Hearing his words, Felix smiled.

“Don’t think for a second I’m leaving you again, Dimitri.”

The night’s ordeals had left them beyond exhausted that they couldn’t spare themselves a meal. They immediately settled themselves down for bed, dressing down into their sleeping attire and taking their respective places.

Before Felix blew out the lone candle illuminating the room, he spoke quietly, his face flushed: “Dimitri, come over here.”

“What? Is there something wrong, Felix?” Dimitri raised his brows in question. “You _are_ sure you’re not hurt anywhere, right?”

“No, I’ve already told you, _I’m fine._ ” Felix ran a hand down his face. The tips of his ears were definitely red. “I’m just telling you to come over here.”

“You mean—?” It was clear that Dimitri was in disbelief. Felix wondered how he managed to put up with him all this years.

“ _Yes,”_ Felix patted the space beside him. “Hurry up before I change my mind.”

It was awkward at first, finding their respective comfortable positions in bed. But once they’ve finally settled, back to back, everything felt _right._

Felix could not believe he actually proposed this. The blush on his face still hasn’t disappeared. But in the end, he could not find it in himself to regret it.

Once Dimitri blew the candle, and once they’ve closed their eyes, Dimitri’s warmth lulled him to a fitful sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> I have been wanting to write this fic for the longest time. It's my pet project lmao.
> 
> I'm on [twitter](https://twitter.com/catefish_)
> 
> Anyway, kudos and comments are greatly appreciated.


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